Already the educated—nay, even the uneducated—mother of the present
day makes use in her care of children of double the brain power but of
only half the muscular force that her grandmother employed. She knows
better how to differentiate between the essential and the unessential;
she can by circumspection obviate much toil and trouble. And when all
mothers receive the practical and theoretical training in nursing
children and the sick, which must be their form of universal service
corresponding to the military service of men, then the problem will be
even more simplified in the direction of the impersonal and more and
more extended in the direction of the personal. The mother must use her
intelligence and her imagination, her artistic sense and her feeling
for nature, her instincts in physiology and psychology, in order to
provide the child with the conditions under which it may develop itself
in the best and freest way; but, on the other hand, she must beware
of—remoulding the child. She will in this way gain much time which at
present is wasted in unnecessary attentions and harmful education.
But avoidance of the personal charge is impossible to the mother
without incurring the dishonour of a fugitive.
There are a number of women who think that the feeling of motherhood
can exist independently of a mother’s care and responsibility for
the child, and that the latter may therefore be taken charge of by
the community and still retain the treasure of motherly and fatherly
affection. These women can never have reflected that, with human
beings as with animals, parental affection is formed by care and
self-sacrifice; that it rises with these; that the less demand is made
upon it, the poorer it becomes. When a father for a time takes the
place of the mother, he becomes as tender as she; when a sick child
exhausts its mother’s strength, it is nearest her heart; and as the
child grows up, her affection becomes less spontaneously intimate,
although instead it may increase through personal intercourse. State
care of young children would mean a withering of the intimacy of
parental affection. The tenderness evoked by the child’s bodily
presence shows, better than any other feeling, the unity of soul and
senses. Without the sensuous presence, the psychical impression loses
its power, as does the bodily impression without the psychical. The
instinct of motherhood, like all others, has been formed through
constancy of external conditions. It is acquired through definite
sensations and associations of ideas. When certain of these emotions,
at first conscious, became unconscious, and were then performed by
lower nerve-centres, the higher nerve-centres, which had formerly been
occupied, were set at liberty for higher uses. But if the sensations
and associations of ideas, which originally formed the instinct,
are weakened, then the instinct loses its automatic sureness. What
worked easily, “of its own accord,” as popular speech rightly has it,
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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