But they maintain that this need not always be effected by means of
continued cohabitation. On the other hand, this may often be necessary,
and in such cases they subordinate their personal claims of happiness
to those of the race. One who holds these opinions regards him who
gives the same answer in every case—whether this answer be “freedom at
any price” or “renunciation at any price”—simply as a moral automaton.
It is true that modern men and women are less able to bear unhappiness
in marriage than were those of former times. This shows that connubial
idealism makes greater demands than formerly.
The conscious will to live, of our time, revolts against the
meaningless sufferings through which the people of bygone days, above
all the women, allowed themselves to be degraded, benumbed, and
embittered. A finer knowledge of self, a stronger consciousness of
personality, now puts a limit to one’s own suffering, since the danger
is understood of taking hurt in one’s soul. This determination of
individualism makes it impossible for the modern woman to be fired by
the ideal of Griselda—if for no other reason, because she feels how
all-suffering meekness increases injustice. The “good old” marriages,
sustained by the willing sacrifice of wives, are disappearing—that is
happily true! But no one takes notice of the new good ones that are
coming in their place. If those who now grudgingly reckon up divorces
would also count all happy marriages, it would be seen that new
formation has proceeded further than dissolution.
It must be evident that the question of divorce is the pursuance of the
line of development of Protestantism. With the formation of a right
and a left party, as usual in the treatment of a problem of culture,
the Reformation succeeded only in asserting the right of the senses in
human life. That it is the right of the soul in sexual life that is now
most intimately affected by the question, people will not understand.
Against the right of the individual they set up that of the child. If
there is none, then a certain number of Christians are willing to admit
that divorce is sometimes justified. Unhappy parents, on the other
hand, must remain together for the sake of the children.
But the erotically noble person of the present day cannot, without the
deepest sense of humiliation, belong to one he does not love, or by
whom he knows he is not loved. Thus for one or both of the parties a
marriage that is persisted in without the love of one or both causes
profound suffering either through this humiliation or through lifelong
celibacy.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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