So it goes--until the professors return with their freight of the
world’s Philistinism. And here came a scene, over which Thyrsis shook
for many a day with merriment. The accounts of the concert are read;
Moses awakens and comes in; and as the agony increases, the members of
the family appear, one by one, clad in their dressing-gowns, and adding
their lamentations to the chorus. Gone is all the prestige of the two
professors, gone all the profits of Moses, gone all the visions of
social triumphs in the city of the middle West!
To all of which uproar the two listen patiently; until at last the
mother, in a transport of vexation, turns upon Helena, and accuses her
of ensnaring the boy. And then--the climax of the scene--Lloyd springs
up; all that Genius in him, which has so far gone into music, turns
now into rage and scorn. He pictures these people--pawing over his
inspiration with their unclean hands--peering at it, weighing it,
chaffering over it--taking it into the market-place to be hawked about.
He shows them what they are, and what that “world” is, to which they
would offer his muse as a whore. And then at the climax of his speech,
as he is waving his violin in the air, the Herr Prof. von Arne ventures
to put in a word; and the boy whirls upon him, and brings down the three
thousand-dollar treasure upon the eminent psychiatrist’s head!
The third act, which was the hardest of all to write, was to take place
in a garret. Lloyd has gone away alone, and three years have passed,
and now he lies dying of a wasting disease. Helena has come to him
again--and still they are fighting the duel. “A woman will do anything
for a man but renounce him,” says Lloyd; and she cannot understand this
fierce instinct of his.
She has come and found him; and he lies gasping for breath, and speaking
in broken sentences. Yet he will not have her bring grief into his
chamber; he has fought his way through grief, and through hatred and
contempt, and now he lies at peace upon the bosom of nature. No longer
is he wrapped up in his own vision; he has learned from the million suns
in the sky and the million trees of the forest. He tells her that the
thing called “Genius” springs ceaselessly from the heart of life.
He has cast out fear; and with it he has cast out love. “What are you?”
he asks. “What am I?” And he sets forth in blazing words his vision of
the soul, which is as a flash of light in a raindrop, and yet one with
the eternal process. As the fruit of his life he leaves one symphony
in manuscript, and some pages of writing in which he has summed up his
faith. That is enough, he says--that is victory; for that he fled away,
and killed his love.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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