Such had been on Ralph the effect of his rare confidence in another—that
other, as will be remembered, having been the sensible, middle-aged, but
nevertheless quite sufficiently “romantic,” Mr. Price. From the date of
his long talk with his odd tutor, the young man’s bewilderments, fors
and againsts, conflicting duties and inclinations, ranged themselves
with wonderful order and celerity. It was all nonsense, “morbid humbug,”
he soon learnt to call it, about his being different from other men,
cut off by peculiar circumstances from what, after all, in plain, honest
English is every man’s birthright—liberty to please himself in the
choice of the helpmeet, without which Providence certainly never
intended him, or any other able-bodied young man, to go through life!
Provided, of course, the prospective helpmeet saw things in the same
way as he; of which, Heaven be thanked, he had no reasonable grounds to
doubt.
What he could do, without too much going out of his way, or any approach
to unmanly subservience, to conciliate his mother, he would. But beyond
a certain point he now saw clearly it was not his duty to defer to
her. Should she show herself inclined to be reasonable, which state of
things, however, he at present felt far from sanguine about: he would be
only too ready to meet her at any point on the friendly road, he would,
in any case, swallow his pride, to the extent of accepting from her
whatever amount of pecuniary assistance she saw fit to afford him.
Pride, indeed, was hardly the word for it, for in a sense the property
was his own, though at present, unfortunately, not to be obtained but by
her good-will. And if she took it into her head to stand out and refuse
him anything? Well, then, he had the appointment at A—— to fall back
upon, the securing of which, his practical good sense and Mr. Price’s
advice, had shown him to be the one distinct duty before him; without
which as a certainty, however small, he had no right to allow the
fortunes of another to be joined to his.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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