Humorous stories; London (England) -- Fiction; Lucia (Fictitious character) -- Fiction; Women -- England -- Fiction
But caution was necessary in the first steps, for it would be hard to
explain to Stephen what the proposed relationship was, and she could not
imagine herself saying “We are going to pretend to be lovers, but we
aren’t.” It would be quite dreadful if he misunderstood and unexpectedly
imprinted on her lips or even her hand a hot lascivious kiss, but up
till now he certainly had not shewn the smallest desire to do anything
of the sort. She would never be able to see him again if he did that,
and the world would probably say that he had dropped her. But she knew
she couldn’t explain the proposed position to him and he would have to
guess: she could only give him a lead and must trust to his
intelligence, and to the absence in him of any unsuspected amorous
proclivities. She would begin gently, anyhow, and have him to dinner
every day that she was at home. And really it would be very pleasant for
him, for she was entertaining a great deal during this next week or
two, and if he only did not yield to one of those rash and turbulent
impulses of the male, all would be well. Georgie, until (so Lucia put it
to herself) Olga had come between them, had done it beautifully, and
Stephen was rather like Georgie. As for herself, she knew she could
trust her firm slow pulses never to beat wild measures for anybody.
* * * * *
She reached home to find that Adele had already arrived, and pausing
only to tell her servant to ring up Stephen and ask him to come round at
once, she went upstairs.
“Dearest Adele,” she said, “a million pardons. I have been in the
Divorce Court all day. Too thrilled. Babs, dear Babs Shyton, was
wonderful. They got nothing out of her at all----”
“No: Lord Middlesex has got everything out of her already,” observed
Adele.
“Ah, how can you say that?” said Lucia. “Lord Middlesex--Woof-dog, you
know--was just as wonderful. I feel sure the jury will believe them.
Dear Babs! I must get her to come here some night soon and have a
friendly little party for her. Think of that horrid old man who had
lunch in the middle of the night! How terrible for her to have to go
back to him. Dear me, what is her address?”
“She may not have to go back to him,” said Adele. “If so, ‘care of
Woof-dog’ would probably find her.”
Adele had been feeling rather cross. Her husband had announced his
intention of visiting his friends and relatives in England, and she did
not feel inclined to make a corresponding journey to America. But as
Lucia went on, she forgot these minor troubles, and became enthralled.
Though she was still talking about Babs and Woof-dog, Adele felt sure
these were only symbols, like the dreams of psycho-analysts.
“My sympathy is entirely with dear Babs,” she said. “Think of her
position with that dreadful old wretch. A woman surely may be pardoned,
even if the jury don’t believe her for----”
“Of course she may,” said Adele with a final spurt of ill-temper. “What
she’s not pardoned for is being found out.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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