Lucifer: A Theosophical Magazine. Volume I. September 1887-February 1888.Various
Religion
Lucifer: A Theosophical Magazine. Volume I. September 1887-February 1888.
Various
Theosophy -- Periodicals
So remote from the ordinary had been the conditions under which the
story was composed, and so small (it had seemed to Gaston) was the
share of its inspiration which his own brain could claim, that now,
within a few weeks of its composition, he read it almost as the work
of another.
This exotic notion, that his own was not his own, deepened as he
read further into the chapter, for something was there which
disquieted him. Some shadowy unembodied likeness, and yet no
likeness, but a faint whispering of resemblance; some voiceless hint
that was but the failure of an echo. He turned back, and read again.
It was not there, he had deceived himself. He shut the page, his
mind at ease.
In a week from this time, he was home again, awaiting the coming of
his father. Sir Selwyn landed in England a month later, and Gaston,
who received him at the vessel’s side, was shocked at his
appearance. Sir Selwyn’s handsome face seemed not so much to have
aged as to have withered; the body, too, was shrunken, and
desiccated, as though the vital fluids were exhausted. The nervous
irritation of manner which had characterised an earlier stage of the
disease, had given way to a species of torpor, in which even speech
seemed an effort. It was the mental and bodily paralysis of
melancholia in its acutest form.
The journey home was a sad one. What little Sir Selwyn said, told
the story of the renewal of his sufferings, which dated from the day
that he had written to Gaston of his intention to return to England.
“But I am persuaded,” he said in conclusion, “that it draws near the
end.”
Strangely enough, however, as Gaston thought, and quite contrary to
his expectations, the sight of his beautiful home revived Sir
Selwyn’s spirits. They dined together, and the baronet showed a
brighter face over his wine. He sent for his bailiff, and spent an
hour or more discussing the affairs of his estate. Afterwards, he
walked with Gaston through the gardens and park, and began, for the
first time, to talk of his travels. Then he questioned Gaston about
his Italian tour, and said:
“What did you do with yourself all those weeks in Palermo? You
mentioned no writing; but I am sure your pen was not idle so long.”
“No,” said Gaston. “I wrote a famous story there. I did not mean to
tell you of it until it was published. It was to be a surprise, for
this is the book that is to make me famous.”
“Come, that sounds well!” said Sir Selwyn. “But you are beginning to
be famous already. What could have been better than the reviews of
your last book which you sent me?”
“Oh, but this one will do twice as much for me!” laughed Gaston.
“I am glad you feel that. No one could be more delighted than I am
to hear it. Have you dedicated it to me, Gaston?”
“Otherwise, my dear father, it would be no book of mine.”
“Thank you, Gaston. You know how dear your fame is to me.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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