amid the crowds at the railway, saw no one, her heart sank a little. But
in a moment she recovered, saying to herself, “Poor boy! why should he
come?” He had never been used to render such attentions. He was uneasy
in the new companionship, to which he was unaccustomed. Perhaps, indeed,
he was ashamed, wounded, mortified, by the poor part he played in it. To
owe his deliverance even to her might be humiliating to his pride. Poor
boy! Thus she explained and softened everything to herself.
But Mrs. Trevanion found herself now the subject of a succession of
surprises very strange to her. She was brought into intimate contact
with a nature she did not understand, and had to learn the very alphabet
of a language unknown to her, and study impulses which left all her
experience of human nature behind, and were absolutely new. When he
understood that he was free, that everything against him was wiped off,
that he was in a position superior to anything he had ever dreamed of,
without need to work or deny himself, his superficial despair gave way
to a burst of pleasure and self-congratulation. Even then he was on his
guard not to receive with too much satisfaction the advantages of which
he had in a moment become possessed, lest perhaps he should miss
something more that might be coming. The unbounded delight which filled
him when he found himself in London, with money in his pocket, and
freedom, showed itself, indeed, in every look; but he still kept a wary
eye upon the possibilities of the future, and would not allow that what
he possessed was above his requirements or hopes. And when he perceived
that the preparations for a further journey were by no means
interrupted, and that Mrs. Trevanion’s plan was still to go abroad, his
disappointment and vexation were not to be controlled.
“What should you go abroad for?” he said. “We’re far better in London.
There is everything in London that can be desired. It is the right place
for a young fellow like me. I have never had any pleasure in my life,
nor the means of seeing anything. And here, the moment I have something
in my power, you want to rush away.”
“There is a great deal to see on the other side of the Channel, Edmund.”
“I dare say--among foreigners whose language one doesn’t know a word of.
And what is it, after all? Scenery, or pictures, and that sort of thing.
Whereas what I want to see is life.”
She looked at him with a strange understanding of all that she would
have desired to ignore, knowing what he meant by some incredible pang of
inspiration, though she had neither any natural acquaintance with such a
strain of thought nor any desire to divine it. “There is life
everywhere,” she said, “and I think it will be very good for you,
Edmund. You are not very strong, and there are so many things to learn.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account