“On Thursday,” she said, mechanically; “on Thursday-- You shall not
complain of me any more.” She held out her hand to him with a smile,
apologetic and deprecatory, which was very sweet, which threw him into a
bewilderment unspeakable. She was cruel without knowing it, without
intending it. She had, she thought, something to make up to this man,
and how could she do it but by kindness--by showing him that she was
grateful--that she liked and honored him? He went away asking himself a
thousand questions, going over and over her simple words, extracting
meanings from them of which they were entirely innocent, framing them at
last to the signification which he wished. He started from Bonport full
of doubt and uneasiness, but before he reached his hotel a foolish
elation had got the better of these sadder sentiments. He said to
himself that these words could have but one meaning. “You shall not
complain of me any more.” But if she cast him off after this long
probation he would have very good reason to complain. It was impossible
that she should prepare a refusal by such words; and, indeed, if she had
meant to refuse him, could she have postponed her answer again? Is it
not honor in a woman to say “No” without delay, unless she means to say
“Yes?” It is the only claim of honor upon her, who makes so many claims
upon the honor of men, to say “No,” if she means “No.” No one could
mistake that primary rule. When she said “Thursday,” was it not the last
assurance she could give before a final acceptance, and “You shall not
complain of me any more?” This is a consequence of the competitive
system in love which Mr. Ruskin evidently did not foresee, for Rosalind,
on the other hand, was right enough when she tried to assure herself
that she had not wished for his love, had not sought it in any way, that
she should be made responsible for its discomfiture. Rivers employed
his time of suspense in making arrangements for his departure. He was a
proud man, and he would not have it said that he had left Aix hastily in
consequence of his disappointment. In the evening he wrote some letters,
vaguely announcing a speedy return. “Perhaps almost as soon as you
receive this,” he said, always guarding against the possibility of a
sudden departure; and then he said to himself that such a thing was
impossible. This was how he spent the intervening days. He had almost
forgotten by this time, in the intensity of personal feeling, the
disappointment and shock to his pride involved in the fact that the lady
of the garden had appeared no more.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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