The “ins” of those days were called Tories, and the “outs” were called Whigs; they fought furiously, and literary rats, hiding in garrets and cellars, wrote pamphlets of personal abuse, which were published anonymously and circulated in the face of jail penalties. Like the laureate Dryden, our would-be dean did this vile writing; he did it for the Whigs, and when he got no preferment there, he joined the Tories, and was made dean of the cathedral in Dublin. There he wrote his “Modest Proposal” for eating the children of Ireland, one of the most terrific pieces of irony in all literature. “Look,” says the ‘gloomy dean,’ “we are letting a population starve to death, and, what a waste of national resources, what a violation of our fundamental principles of business economy. Let us feed these Irish babies, and when they are nice and fat, serve them on our tables; they will be happy during their brief span of life, and we shall no longer have to import food from foreign parts.” Then came “Gulliver’s Travels,” which took its place along with “Pilgrim’s Progress” as required reading for children and adults. It is an even more perfect allegory; you can read it as a story pure and simple, without any idea of an ulterior meaning. The author helps you by the perfect gravity with which he describes every detail of these singular adventures. First we visit the land in which the people are only six inches tall, and so we laugh at the pettiness of human affairs. Then we visit the land where they are correspondingly big, and we learn how brutal and gross and stupid we really are. So on, until we come to the land of noble and beautiful horses, in which human beings are lewd and filthy apes. So we learn the worst possible about a world which appointed a man of genius to be dean of St. Patrick’s in Dublin, when he wanted to be dean of St. Paul’s in London. So we are ready to go insane, and to die, as the dean himself phrased it, “like a poisoned rat in a hole.” CHAPTER XLVII VIRTUE REWARDED Prose fiction up to this time had dealt for the most part with men; its most popular variety was the “picaresque,” telling the adventures of vagabonds and rascals. But now in this bourgeois England the fiction writer settles down, and becomes respectable, and discovers the theme which is to occupy him for the next two hundred years--the feminine heart, and what goes on in it during the mating season.