Man and Superman: A Comedy and a PhilosophyShaw, Bernard
Philosophy
Man and Superman: A Comedy and a Philosophy
Shaw, Bernard
English drama; Man-woman relationships -- Drama
MRS WHITEFIELD. Why, of course I do. What queer things you say, Jack! We
can't help loving our own blood relations.
TANNER. Well, perhaps it saves unpleasantness to say so. But for my
part, I suspect that the tables of consanguinity have a natural basis in
a natural repugnance [he rises].
MRS WHITEFIELD. You shouldn't say things like that, Jack. I hope you
won't tell Ann that I have been speaking to you. I only wanted to
set myself right with you and Tavy. I couldn't sit mumchance and have
everything put on me.
TANNER. [politely] Quite so.
MRS WHITEFIELD. [dissatisfied] And now I've only made matters worse.
Tavy's angry with me because I don't worship Ann. And when it's been put
into my head that Ann ought to marry you, what can I say except that it
would serve her right?
TANNER. Thank you.
MRS WHITEFIELD. Now don't be silly and twist what I say into something I
don't mean. I ought to have fair play--
Ann comes from the villa, followed presently by Violet, who is dressed
for driving.
ANN. [coming to her mother's right hand with threatening suavity] Well,
mamma darling, you seem to be having a delightful chat with Jack. We can
hear you all over the place.
MRS WHITEFIELD. [appalled] Have you overheard--
TANNER. Never fear: Ann is only--well, we were discussing that habit of
hers just now. She hasn't heard a word.
MRS WHITEFIELD. [stoutly] I don't care whether she has or not: I have a
right to say what I please.
VIOLET. [arriving on the lawn and coming between Mrs Whitefield and
Tanner] I've come to say goodbye. I'm off for my honeymoon.
MRS WHITEFIELD. [crying] Oh don't say that, Violet. And no wedding, no
breakfast, no clothes, nor anything.
VIOLET. [petting her] It won't be for long.
MRS WHITEFIELD. Don't let him take you to America. Promise me that you
won't.
VIOLET. [very decidedly] I should think not, indeed. Don't cry, dear:
I'm only going to the hotel.
MRS WHITEFIELD. But going in that dress, with your luggage, makes one
realize--[she chokes, and then breaks out again] How I wish you were my
daughter, Violet!
VIOLET. [soothing her] There, there: so I am. Ann will be jealous.
MRS WHITEFIELD. Ann doesn't care a bit for me.
ANN. Fie, mother! Come, now: you mustn't cry any more: you know Violet
doesn't like it [Mrs Whitefield dries her eyes, and subsides].
VIOLET. Goodbye, Jack.
TANNER. Goodbye, Violet.
VIOLET. The sooner you get married too, the better. You will be much
less misunderstood.
TANNER. [restively] I quite expect to get married in the course of the
afternoon. You all seem to have set your minds on it.
VIOLET. You might do worse. [To Mrs Whitefield: putting her arm round
her] Let me take you to the hotel with me: the drive will do you good.
Come in and get a wrap. [She takes her towards the villa].
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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