Sir Henry's generosity, which was totally unexpected by Augustus, served
but to imbitter his regrets for the loss of his benefactor. In him he
had lost his earliest friend; for his uncle he considered as an entire
stranger, and of his parents he retained no recollection. Whatever had
been the errors of Sir Henry's judgment, his benevolence had never
failed towards Mordaunt; and, while his many virtues had always ensured
respect, his kindness had sunk deep in the grateful heart of Augustus,
as, in their intercourse, essential obligation had never been cancelled
by casual caprice, or rendered irksome by ungracious austerity of
manner. He however carefully suppressed his own feelings, in order the
better to administer consolation to those of Selina; and while Mrs.
Galton and Mr. Temple, with affection almost paternal, used every
argument which religion and reason could suggest, to reconcile her as
much as possible to her loss; Augustus endeavoured by the tenderest care
and unremitting attention to divert her thoughts from her recent
calamity, and thereby gradually soften the poignancy of her sorrow.
Selina had, till the moment when she was deprived of her father, been
totally unacquainted with grief; for when her mother died, she was too
young to be sensible of her loss; and Mrs. Galton's almost maternal
kindness had filled the void of her infant heart, while she was yet
scarcely conscious of its existence. At first she could hardly be
persuaded that Sir Henry really breathed no more; so sudden, and to her
so unexpected, was his dissolution. But, after she had in some degree
relieved her heart, by giving way to the first outrageous burst of
sorrow, on being convinced he was indeed no longer in existence, she
became almost stupified by the overpowering weight of her misfortune.
Sometimes she would rouse herself from her torpor, by questioning
herself, was what had passed but a dream, or an agonizing reality? Was
it possible she should never more hear his beloved voice, or see the
smile of parental fondness play round the cold lips, that were now
closed for ever? Was she never again to feel the delight of cheering a
parent's couch of sickness by the playful sallies of her imagination, or
soothing the acuteness of pain by those considerate attentions affection
only teaches us to pay. Alas! from whom could she now expect to hear the
joyful sound of welcome, with which her return was always greeted,
however short her absence might have been? or from whom could she now
hope to meet the approving glance, that more than rewarded the merit it
applauded; or experience that partiality, that accorded a ready
extenuation of the errors it could not overlook? Whilst these
reflections crowded on her mind, she felt as if the spring of all her
actions was broken, and in the despondency of the moment, thought she
would willingly have exchanged half the remaining years of her life to
recal a few short moments of her past existence.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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