"So far, indeed, was I from this kind of stoical indifference, that,
rushing at once into the very opposite extreme, I returned, or rather
flew back to her without an instant's reflection. I lifted her in my
arms; I gave her a thousand tender kisses; I implored her to pardon my
ungovernable temper; I confessed that I was an absolute brute, and
unworthy of being loved by such an angel.
"I made her sit down, and throwing myself, in my turn, upon my knees, I
conjured her to listen to me in that attitude. Then I briefly
expressed all that a submissive and impassioned lover could say most
tender and respectful. I supplicated her pardon. She let her arms fall
over my neck, as she said that it was she who stood in need of
forgiveness, and begged of me in mercy to forget all the annoyances she
had caused me, and that she began, with reason, to fear that I should
not approve of what she had to say in her justification. 'Me!' said I
interrupting her impatiently; 'I require no justification; I approve of
all you have done. It is not for me to demand excuses for anything you
do; I am but too happy, too contented, if my dear Manon will only leave
me master of her affections! But,' continued I, remembering that it
was the crisis of my fate, 'may I not, Manon, all-powerful Manon, you
who wield at your pleasure my joys and sorrows, may I not be permitted,
after having conciliated you by my submission and all the signs of
repentance, to speak to you now of my misery and distress? May I now
learn from your own lips what my destiny is to be, and whether you are
resolved to sign my death-warrant, by spending even a single night with
my rival?'
"She considered a moment before she replied. 'My good chevalier,' said
she, resuming the most tranquil tone, 'if you had only at first
explained yourself thus distinctly, you would have spared yourself a
world of trouble, and prevented a scene that has really annoyed me.
Since your distress is the result of jealousy, I could at first have
cured that by offering to accompany you where you pleased. But I
imagined it was caused by the letter which I was obliged to write in
the presence of G---- M----, and of the girl whom we sent with it. I
thought you might have construed that letter into a mockery; and have
fancied that, by sending such a messenger, I meant to announce my
abandonment of you for the sake of G---- M----. It was this idea that
at once overwhelmed me with grief; for, innocent as I knew myself to
be, I could not but allow that appearances were against me. However,'
continued she, 'I will leave you to judge of my conduct, after I shall
have explained the whole truth.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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