England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Humorous stories, English; River life -- Fiction; Sea stories, English
To his dismay he found when he awoke in the morning that what little
wind there was had dropped in the night, and the billy-boy was just
rising and falling lazily on the water in a fashion most objectionable
to an empty stomach. It was the last straw, and he made things so
uncomfortable below that the crew were glad to escape on deck, where
they squatted down in the bows, and proceeded to review a situation
which was rapidly becoming unbearable.
“I’ve ’ad enough of it, Joe,” grumbled the boy. “I’m sore all over with
sleeping on the floor, and the old man’s temper gets wuss and wuss. I’m
going to be ill.”
“Whaffor?” queried Joe dully.
“You tell the missus I’m down below ill. Say you think I’m dying,”
responded the infant Machiavelli, “then you’ll see somethink if you
keep your eyes open.”
He went below again, not without a little nervousness, and, clambering
into Joe’s bunk, rolled over on his back and gave a deep groan.
“What’s the matter with _you!_” growled the skipper, who was lying in
the other bunk staving off the pangs of hunger with a pipe.
“I’m very ill—dying,” said Jemmy, with another groan.
“You’d better stay in bed and have your breakfast brought down here,
then,” said the skipper kindly.
“I don’t want no breakfast,” said Jem faintly.
“That’s no reason why you shouldn’t have it sent down, you unfeeling
little brute,” said the skipper indignantly. “You tell Joe to bring you
down a great plate o’ cold meat and pickles, and some coffee; that’s
what you want.”
“All right, sir,” said Jemmy. “I hope they won’t let the missus come
down here, in case it’s something catching. I wouldn’t like her to be
took bad.”
“Eh?” said the skipper, in alarm. “Certainly not. Here, you go up and
die on deck. Hurry up with you.”
“I can’t; I’m too weak,” said Jemmy.
“You get up on deck at once; d’ye hear me?” hissed the skipper, in
alarm.
“I c-c-c-can’t help it,” sobbed Jemmy, who was enjoying the situation
amazingly. “I b’lieve it’s sleeping on the hard floor’s snapped
something inside me.”
“If you don’t go I’ll take you,” said the skipper, and he was about to
rise to put his threat into execution when a shadow fell across the
opening, and a voice, which thrilled him to the core, said softly,
“Jemmy!”
“Yes ’m?” said Jemmy languidly, as the skipper flattened himself in his
bunk and drew the clothes over him.
“How do you feel?” inquired Mrs. Harbolt.
“Bad all over,” said Jemmy. “Oh, don’t come down, mum—please don’t.”
“Rubbish!” said Mrs. Harbolt tartly, as she came slowly and carefully
down backwards. “What a dark hole this is, Jemmy. No wonder you’re ill.
Put your tongue out.”
Jemmy complied.
“I can’t see properly here,” murmured the lady, “but it looks very
large. S’pose you go in the other bunk, Jemmy. It’s a good bit higher
than this, and you’d get more air and be more comfortable altogether.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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