"No, sister Margaret, no," replied Mark with a little impatience, and to
escape his sister-in-law's inquisitive solicitude, he withdrew to his
room. He took up his guitar and tried to thrum the _Jota Aragonesa_, but
there was no melody there to soothe his troubled breast. He skimmed over
a page or two of Burton's "Anatomy of Melancholy," that Dr. Wattletop
had recommended him to read, but his feelings were too much in
consonance with the subject treated of to be diverted by it, and he
threw the book aside, filled his briar-wood pipe, and sought
consolation in Killikinnick. Even that resource failed him, and the fire
in the bowl died away unheeded. Then to shake off the tristful thoughts
he paced his room, but the old wound inflicted by Edna's cruel
commiseration seemed to bleed afresh, and the remembrance of that bitter
pity unceasingly returned, until chagrin gave place to anger vented in
fierce execrations on his halting foot, alternated with lamentations on
his unfortunate condition. He believed he could have borne almost any
other bodily infirmity better, and would gladly have given his right arm
to walk as other men. What an effort it had cost him to deny himself the
inestimable pleasure of beholding the object of his adoration in all the
pride of her beauty! And yet, why had he done so? Although imperfect in
a trivial degree, would he, after all, suffer much in comparison with
others? Byron, the splendid Byron, was lame, and so was Walter Scott,
and were they not the idols of society? Would her glance fall that
evening on a handsomer face? He stopped before a mirror, that reflected
eyes full of superb fire, and a brow as fine as any that ever adorned
child of Hellas, and he smiled with gratified vanity, like a brainless
coquette. But instantly ashamed of his weakness, he turned away, drew on
his overcoat, and sought the streets to distract him from unwholesome
reveries. Unwittingly his feet followed the accustomed path, and he was
half way to the Cliff before he discovered his absence of mind. He would
have retraced his steps and gone in another direction, but an
irresistible impulse urged him on.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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