Labrador (N.L.) -- Fiction; London (England) -- Fiction; Love stories, English
For this, indeed, is the truth of passionate love, that it works outs
its purpose and comes to an end. A day arrives in every marriage when
the lovers must face each other, disillusioned, stripped of the last
shred of excitement--undisguisedly themselves. And our two were married;
they had bound themselves together under a penalty of scandalous
disgrace, to take the life-long consequences of their passionate
association.
It was upon Trafford that this exhaustion of the sustaining magic of
love pressed most severely, because it was he who had made the greatest
adaptations to the exigencies of their union. He had crippled, he
perceived more and more clearly, the research work upon which his whole
being had once been set, and his hours were full of tiresome and trivial
duties and his mind engaged and worried by growing financial anxieties.
He had made these abandonments in a phase of exalted passion for the one
woman in the world and her unprecedented child, and now he saw, in spite
of all his desire not to see, that she was just a weak human being among
human beings, and neither she nor little Margharita so very marvellous.
But while Marjorie shrank to the dimensions of reality, research
remained still a luminous and commanding dream. In love one fails or one
wins home, but the lure of research is for ever beyond the hills, every
victory is a new desire. Science has inexhaustibly fresh worlds to
conquer....
He was beginning now to realize the dilemma of his life, the reality of
the opposition between Marjorie and child and home on the one hand and
on the other this big wider thing, this remoter, severer demand upon his
being. He had long perceived these were distinct and different things,
but now it appeared more and more inevitable that they should be
antagonistic and mutually disregardful things. Each claimed him
altogether, it seemed, and suffered compromise impatiently. And this is
where the particular stress of his situation came in. Hitherto he had
believed that nothing of any importance was secret or inexplicable
between himself and Marjorie. His ideal of his relationship had assumed
a complete sympathy of feeling, an almost instinctive identity of
outlook. And now it was manifest they were living in a state of
inadequate understanding, that she knew only in the most general and
opaque forms, the things that interested him so profoundly, and had but
the most superficial interest in his impassioned curiosities. And
missing as she did the strength of his intellectual purpose she missed
too, she had no inkling of, the way in which her careless expansiveness
pressed upon him. She was unaware that she was destroying an essential
thing in his life.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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