Married Love: A New Contribution to the Solution of Sex DifficultiesStopes, Marie Carmichael
Science
Married Love: A New Contribution to the Solution of Sex Difficulties
Stopes, Marie Carmichael
Man-woman relationships; Marriage; Sex (Psychology); Sex differences; Sex in marriage
While modern marriage is tending to give ever more and more freedom
to each of the partners, there is at the same time a unity of work
and interest growing up which brings them together on a higher
plane than the purely domestic one which was so confining to the
women and so dull to the men. Every year one sees a widening of the
independence and the range of the pursuits of women: but still,
far too often, marriage puts an end to woman's intellectual life.
Marriage can never reach its full stature until women possess as
much intellectual freedom and freedom of opportunity within it as do
their partners.
That at present the majority of women neither desire freedom for
creative work, nor would know how to use it, is only a sign that
we are still living in the shadow of the coercive and dwarfing
influences of the past.
In an interesting article on woman's intellectual work, W. Thomas
(1907, "Sex and Society") says:
The American woman, with the enjoyment of greater liberty,
has made an approach toward the standards of professional
scholarship, and some individuals stand at the very top in their
university studies and examinations. The trouble with these
cases is that they are either swept away and engulfed by the
modern system of marriage, or find themselves excluded in some
intangible way from association with men in the fullest sense,
and no career open to their talents.
He sees clearly that this is but a passing phase in the development
of our society, and he advocates a wider scope for the play of
married women's powers.
The practice of an occupational activity of her own choosing,
and a generous attitude towards this on the part of the man,
would contribute to relieve the strain and make marriage more
frequently successful.
When woman naturally develops the powers latent within her, man will
find at his side not only a mate, free and strong, but a desirable
friend and an intellectual comrade.
The desire for freedom, both for physical and mental exploration and
for experiences outside the sacred enclosure of the home, may at
first sight appear to be conflicting and entirely incompatible with
the ideal of closer and more perfect unity between the married pair.
But this conflict is only apparent, though it is true that most
writers have failed to realise this. Consequently in some sections
of the writing and teaching of the "advanced" schools there are
claims only for increased freedom--a freedom to wander at will--a
freedom in which the wanderer does not return to his fixed centre.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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