I do not believe that the bully and braggart is more in evidence in
Kentucky and Texas than in other Commonwealths of the Union, except
that each is by the space writers made the favorite arena of his
exploits and adopted as the scene of the comic stories told at his
expense. The son-of-a-gun from Bitter Creek, like the “elegant
gentleman” from the Dark and Bloody Ground, represents a certain type
to be found more or less developed in each and every State of the
Union. He is not always a coward. Driven, as it were, to the wall, he
will often make good.
He is as a rule in quest of adventures. He enters the village from the
countryside and approaches the mêlée. “Is it a free fight?” says he.
Assured that it is, “Count me in,” says he. Ten minutes later, “Is it
still a free fight?” he says, and, again assured in the affirmative,
says he, “Count me out.”
Once the greatest of bullies provoked old Aaron Pennington, “the
strongest man in the world,” who struck out from the shoulder and
landed his victim in the middle of the street. Here he lay in a
helpless heap until they carted him off to the hospital, where for a
day or two he flickered between life and death. “Foh God,” said
Pennington, “I barely teched him.”
This same bully threatened that when a certain mountain man came to
town he would “finish him.” The mountain man came. He was enveloped in
an old-fashioned cloak, presumably concealing his armament, and walked
about ostentatiously in the proximity of his boastful foeman, who
remained as passive as a lamb. When, having failed to provoke a fight,
he had taken himself off, an onlooker said: “Bill, I thought you were
going to do him up?”
“But,” says Bill, “did you see him?”
“Yes, I saw him. What of that?”
“Why,” exclaimed the bully, “that man was a walking arsenal.”
Aaron Pennington, the strong man just mentioned, was, in his younger
days, a river pilot. Billy Hite, a mite of a man, was clerk. They had a
disagreement, when Aaron told Billy that if he caught him on “the
harrican deck,” he would pitch him overboard. The next day Billy
appeared whilst Aaron, off duty, was strolling up and down outside the
pilot-house, and strolled offensively in his wake. Never a hostile
glance or a word from Aaron. At last, tired of dumb show, Billy broke
forth with a torrent of imprecation closing with “When are you going to
pitch me off the boat, you blankety-blank son-of-a-gun and coward?”
Aaron Pennington was a brave man. He was both fearless and
self-possessed. He paused, gazed quizzically at his little tormentor,
and says he: “Billy, you got a pistol, and you want to get a pretext to
shoot me, and I ain’t going to give it to you.”
II
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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