Were a man never so lonely, there is something in a first introduction
to a strange city which communicates a spirit of elation. The mere
strangeness of what he sees, the novel aspect of things, the touch of
the original and unexpected in the buildings, the conformation of the
streets, the faces of the hurrying throngs--this new note of life,
everywhere audible, is itself so surprising and absorbing that the mind
is insensibly withdrawn from the contemplation of private griefs and
memories. A more exact examination may reveal the depressing fact that
a new world is new alone in name; that men carry their conventions with
them wheresoever they travel, and may reproduce upon the loneliest rock
of the Pacific or in the heart of the Sahara the complete social
counterpart of those narrower forms of civilisation which they might be
supposed to have renounced for ever. But even so, it still remains
true that the thing which seems new is really new to us, for we live by
our sensations as much as by our knowledge. He who cannot yield
himself to this illusion of the senses will certainly deny himself the
finer pleasures of existence; he will march across the world with the
stiff air of the pedant, who sacrifices poetry to precision, declining
more and more into a bloomless frugality of life, until at last not
alone the outer world but the inner places of his own heart will become
arid as a desert.
Arthur was much too young to reject the illusion of the senses, and too
essentially a poet to desire to do so. He had his own private griefs,
and they were by no means a negligible burden. In the noisy darkness
of the long nights at sea, when the clanging of the piston kept him
wakeful, he had again and again reviewed these griefs with a
self-torturing persistence. Would he ever see his mother again?--and
sometimes out of the heart of the black night a voice told him he would
not. Would that exquisite but slender bond that held him to Elizabeth
withstand the strain of a dateless separation? Would he find the
things he sought, have strength to build the life he had had the vision
to design, justify himself before the world? These and many cognate
thoughts oppressed him; they wrote their abrupt interrogations on the
curtain of the night, until he hid his face from them, and could have
wept for weakness. But in spite of these oppressions, his spirit had
gained both in hope and fortitude upon the voyage. He had begun to
find himself blunderingly, as all men must at first, yet with some
sincerity and real truth of vision. Two things he had discovered in
himself which appeared to him a sufficient base for life, at once a
programme and a creed--the one was the fixed determination to be
content only with the best kind of life, the other was a faith in the
Guiding Hand. From this creed he drew both his inspiration and his
courage, and the more he dwelt upon it the more his heart leaped to
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