Women -- France -- Fiction; Women's rights -- Fiction
“My opinion, Edmee,” answered the abbe, crossing his arms on his breast
and striking his brow at intervals, “is that you do not take the right
view of your situation. At times it distresses you to such an extent
that you lose all hope and long to die--yes, my dear child, to such
an extent that your health plainly suffers. At other times, and I must
speak candidly at the risk of offending you a little, you view your
perils with a levity and cheerfulness that astound me.”
“That last reproach is delicately put, dear friend,” she replied; “but
allow me to justify myself. Your astonishment arises from the fact that
you do not know the Mauprat race. It is a tameless, incorrigible race,
from which naught but Headbreakers and Hamstringers may issue. Even
in those who have been most polished by education there remains many a
stubborn knot--a sovereign pride, a will of iron, a profound contempt
for life. Look at my father. In spite of his adorable goodness, you see
that he is sometimes so quick-tempered that he will smash his snuff-box
on the table, when you get the better of him in some political argument,
or when you win a game of chess. For myself, I am conscious that my
veins are as full-blooded as if I had been born in the noble ranks of
the people; and I do not believe that any Mauprat has ever shone at
court for the charm of his manners. Since I was born brave, how would
you have me set much store by life? And yet there are weak moments in
which I get discouraged more than enough, and bemoan my fate like the
true woman that I am. But, let some one offend me, or threaten me, and
the blood of the strong surges through me again; and then, as I cannot
crush my enemy, I fold my arms and smile with compassion at the idea
that he should ever have hoped to frighten me. And do not look upon this
as mere bombast, abbe. To-morrow, this evening perhaps, my words may
turn to deeds. This little pearl-handled knife does not look like deeds
of blood; still, it will be able to do its work, and ever since Don
Marcasse (who knows what he is about) sharpened it, I have had it by me
night and day, and my mind is made up. I have not a very strong fist,
but it will no doubt manage to give myself a good stab with this knife,
even as it manages to give my horse a cut with the whip. Well, that
being so, my honour is safe; it is only my life, which hangs by a
thread, which is at the mercy of a glass of wine, more or less, that
M. Bernard may happen to drink one of these evenings; of some change
meeting, or some exchange of looks between De la Marche and myself that
he may fancy he has detected; a breath of air perhaps! What is to be
done? Were I to grieve, would my tears wash away the past? We cannot
tear out a single page of our lives; but we can throw the book into
the fire. Though I should weep from night till morn, would that prevent
Destiny from having, in a fit of ill-humour, taken me out hunting, sent
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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