Women -- France -- Fiction; Women's rights -- Fiction
From this hour I felt my love descending from the wild storms of the
brain into the healthy regions of the heart. Devotion seemed no longer
an enigma to me. I resolved that on the very next morning I would give
proof of my submission and affection. It was quite late when I returned
to the chateau, tired out, dying of hunger, and exhausted by the
emotions I had experienced. I entered the pantry, found a piece of
bread, and began eating it, all moist with my tears. I was leaning
against the stove in the dime light of a lamp that was almost out, when
I suddenly saw Edmee enter. She took a few cherries from a chest and
slowly approached the stove, pale and deep in thought. On seeing me she
uttered a cry and let the cherries fall.
“Edmee,” I said, “I implore you never to be afraid of me again. That is
all I can say now; for I do not know how to explain myself; and yet I
had resolved to say many things.”
“You must tell me them some other time, cousin,” she answered, trying to
smile.
But she was unable to disguise the fear she felt at finding herself
alone with me.
I did not try to detain her. I felt deeply pained and humiliated at her
distrust of me, and I knew I had no right to complain. Yet never had any
man stood in greater need of a word of encouragement.
Just as she was going out of the room I broke down altogether, and burst
into tears, as on the previous night at the chapel window. Edmee stopped
on the threshold and hesitated a moment. Then, yielding to the kindly
impulses of her heart, she overcame her fears and returned towards me.
Pausing a few yards from my chair, she said:
“Bernard, you are unhappy. Tell me; is it my fault?”
I was unable to reply; I was ashamed of my tears, but the more I tried
to restrain them the more my breast heaved with sobs. With men as
physically strong as I was, tears are generally convulsions; mine were
like the pangs of death.
“Come now! Just tell me what is wrong,” cried Edmee, with some of the
bluntness of sisterly affection.
And she ventured to put her hand on my shoulder. She was looking at me
with an expression of wistfulness, and a big tear was trickling down her
cheek. I threw myself on my knees and tried to speak, but that was still
impossible. I could do no more than mutter the word _to-morrow_ several
times.
“‘To-morrow?’ What of tomorrow?” said Edmee. “Do you not like being
here? Do you want to go away?”
“I will go, if it will please you,” I replied. “Tell me; do you wish
never to see me again?”
“I do not wish that at all,” she rejoined. “You will stop here, won’t
you.”
“It is for you to decide,” I answered.
She looked at me in astonishment. I was still on my knees. She leant
over the back of my chair.
“Yes; I am quite sure that you are good at heart,” she said, as if
she were answering some inner objection. “A Mauprat can be nothing by
halves; and as soon as you have once known a good quarter of an hour, it
is certain you ought to have a noble life before you.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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