how I thanked him for his wise forethought while my husband stormed
because it was so far beyond his reach! We might have lived in all my
accustomed style on the interest if my husband had been just; but now,
instead of sumptuous apparel I had to make the best of garments bought
before my marriage, while cheap hotels took the place of my former
elegant surroundings. My one passionate desire was to be free from this
hated union and many a time, no doubt, I was a murderess in my heart in
my longing to see him dead. At last my wish was granted. He was brought
home to me one night, a pistol-shot through his heart, received in a low
gambling hell. I did not trouble to inquire the particulars. He has been
dead a year. I have returned to America--for, at the time of his death,
we were in Europe. I have waited a decent time; and now, can you guess
what has brought me to Cavendish?"
I shrank away from her when she turned towards me, a gracious smile on
her face. "You are silent. Is it a hopeless errand I have come on, think
you?"
"If you have come to seek Mr. Winthrop's pardon, I think it is----"
"You do not realize my influence over him. I could bend him to my will
like the merest child."
I opened the album which still lay on my knee. "You must not expect to
meet the same man you knew here. He has changed--matured since then--if
I can judge from his face."
"His heart, I am convinced, is unchanged. He is not one to forget the one
passion of his life. You have not gauged the depths of his character. Ah,
me! that I should have flung such a man away!"
I made no reply, seeing she was convinced of her power; but, with all her
maddening grace and beauty, I kept the hope still that she would fail.
I could fancy Mr. Winthrop trampling ruthlessly on the strongest pleading
of his heart sooner than stoop to the degradation of a second time asking
her to be his wife.
"You have been thinking it all out, and have decided there is no chance
for me."
"How do you know?" I asked, startled by her correct guess.
"Your face is a very open page. Be careful when you get to love a man,
which as yet I do not think you have ever done, lest your secret may too
easily be discovered. Men usually care very little for what costs them no
trouble."
My face flushed hotly, but I made her no reply.
"I expected you to flash back that you were never going to fall in love.
It is the way with most unsophisticated young people."
"If I should, and my love is returned, I will be faithful to any vows
I may make."
"My dear friend, you are too inexperienced to make such rash promises.
You do not know what mutinous elements are slumbering in your heart."
"God help me to have principle enough to smother them if they are there
and get wakened."
I rose to go, as night was rapidly falling.
"I can stay no longer and so far as my helping you is concerned, I have
been summoned uselessly," I said, coldly.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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