I thought I saw the hands of the priests tremble as they tossed the incense, and even the acolytes shiver as they held their robes. Suddenly my mind changed: I felt--what was it I felt?--a union of malignity, despair, and power, the most formidable. Lightning seemed flashing from my eyes as I reflected,--I might make the sacrificers and the sacrificed change places in one moment,--I might blast my mother as she stood, by a word,--I might break my father’s heart, by a single sentence,--I might scatter more desolation around me, than it was apparently possible for human vice, human power, or human malignity, more potent than both, to cause to its most abject victim.--Yes!--on that morning I felt within myself the struggles of nature, feeling, compunction, pride, malevolence, and despair.--The former I had brought with me, the latter had been all acquired in the convent. I said to those who attended me that morning, “You are arraying me for a victim, but I can turn the executioners into the victims if I please”--and I laughed. The laugh terrified those who were about me--they retreated--they represented my state to the Superior. He came to my apartment. The whole convent was by this time alarmed--their credit was at stake--the preparations had all been made--the whole world was determined I was to be a monk, mad or not. “The Superior was terrified, I saw, as he entered my apartment. “My son, what means all this?” “Nothing, my father--nothing but a sudden thought that has struck me.” “We will discuss it another time, my son; at present--” “_At present_,” I repeated with a laugh that must have lacerated the Superior’s ears--“At present I have but one alternative to propose--let my father or my brother take my place--that is all. I will never be a monk.” The Superior, at these words, ran in despair round the cell. I followed him, exclaiming, in a voice that must have filled him with horror, “I exclaim against the vows--let those who forced me to it, take the guilt on themselves--let my father, in his own person, expiate his guilt in bringing me into the world--let my brother sacrifice his pride--why must I be the only victim of the crime of the one, and the passions of the other?” “My son, all this was arranged before.” “Yes, I know that--I know that by a decree of the Almighty I was doomed to be cursed even in my mother’s womb, but I will never subscribe that decree with my own hand.” “My son, what can I say to you--you have passed your noviciate.” “Yes, in a state of stupefaction.” “All Madrid is assembled to hear you take your vows.” “Then all Madrid shall hear me renounce them, and disavow them.” “This is the very day fixed on. The ministers of God are prepared to yield you to his arms. Heaven and earth,--all that is valuable in time, or precious in eternity, are summoned, are waiting for the irrevocable words that seal your salvation, and ensure that of those you love. What demon has taken possession of you, my