Autobiographical fiction; Bildungsromans; England -- Fiction; Feminist fiction; Love stories; Sex role -- Fiction; Young women -- Fiction
I retired to my chamber, and, with a trembling hand, traced, and
addressed to my husband, a few incoherent lines--briefly hinting my
suspicions respecting the late transactions--exhorting him to provide
for his safety, and offering to be the companion of his flight. I
added--'Let us reap wisdom from these tragical consequences of _indulged
passion_! It is not to atone for the past error, by cutting off the
prospect of future usefulness--Repentance for what can never be
recalled, is absurd and vain, but as it affords a lesson for the time
to come--do not let us wilfully forfeit the fruits of our dear-bought
experience! I will never reproach you! Virtuous resolution, and time,
may yet heal these aggravated wounds. Dear Montague, be no longer
the slave of error; inflict not on my tortured mind new, and more
insupportable, terrors! I await your directions--let us fly--let us
summon our fortitude--let us, at length, bravely stem the tide of
passion--let us beware of the criminal pusillanimity of despair!'
With faultering steps, I sought the apartment of my husband. I listened
a moment at the door--and hearing him in motion, while profound sighs
burst every instant from his bosom, I slid my paper under the door,
unfolded, that it might be the more likely to attract his attention.
Presently, I had the satisfaction of hearing him take it up. After some
minutes, a slip of paper was returned, by the same method which I had
adopted, in which was written, in characters blotted, and scarcely
legible, the following words--
'Leave me, one half hour, to my reflections: at the end of that period,
be assured, I will see, or write, to you.'
I knew him to be incapable of falsehood--my heart palpitated with hope.
I went to my chamber, and passed the interval in a thousand cruel
reflections, and vague plans for our sudden departure. Near an hour
had elapsed, when the bell rang. I started, breathless, from my seat.
A servant passed my door, to take his master's orders. He returned
instantly, and, meeting me in the passage, delivered to me a letter.
I heard Montague again lock the door.--Disappointed, I re-entered my
chamber. In my haste to get at the contents of the paper, I almost tore
it in pieces--the words swam before my sight. I held it for some moments
in my hand, incapable of decyphering the fatal characters. I breathed
with difficulty--all the powers of life seemed suspended--when the
report of a pistol roused me to a sense of confused horror.--Rushing
forward, I burst, with preternatural strength, into the apartment of my
husband--What a spectacle!--Assistance was vain!--Montague--the impetuous,
ill-fated, Montague--_was no more--was a mangled corpse_!--Rash,
unfortunate, young, man!
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