Yet he was not at all times equally serene. Returning one day from a visit to a dying bed, he called at the residence of a brother minister, the Rev. R. Cartwright, in a state of some dejection. He entered on the subject of death with feeling, and expressed some fears with regard to his own salvation. Mr. Cartwright remarked upon the happiness of himself and his friend as being both so near to their eternal rest, to which Mr. Marsden seriously replied with emphasis, "But Mr. C----, _if_ I am there." "If, Mr. Marsden?" rejoined his friend, surprised at the doubt implied. The aged disciple then brought forward several passages of Scripture bearing upon the deep responsibility of the ministerial office coupled with his own unworthiness; "lest I myself should be a castaway;" "if we hold the beginning of our confidence stedfast unto the end;" remarking on his own sinfulness,--every thing he had done being tainted with sin,--on his utter uselessness,--and contrasting all this with the holiness and purity of God. At another time, coming from the factory after a visit to a dying woman, and deeply impressed with the awfulness of a dying hour in the case of one who was unprepared to die, he repeated in a very solemn manner some lines from Blair's once celebrated poem on the grave-- "In that dread moment how the frantic soul Raves round the walls of her clay tenement, Runs to each avenue and shrieks for help, But shrieks in vain. How wistfully she looks On all she is leaving; now no longer hers. A little longer, yet a little longer. Oh! might she stay To wash away her crimes, and fit her for her passage." He then spoke on the plan of salvation and the grace offered by the gospel with great feeling. The holiness and purity of God appeared at times to overwhelm his soul; contrasting it, as he did, with his own sinfulness, and viewing it in connexion with the fact that he must soon stand before his awful presence. Yet he speedily recovered his habitual peace, recalling the blessed truth that "there is now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus." He was still on the whole a most cheerful Christian, joying and rejoicing in the hope of a blessed immortality. And as he drew near his journey's end his prospects were still brighter and his peace increased. CHAPTER XII. State of New South Wales--The Aborigines--Cruelties practised upon them--Attempts to civilize and convert them--They fail--Mr. Marsden's Seventh Visit to New Zealand--His Daughter's Journal--Affection of the Natives--Progress of the Mission--Danger from European vices--Returns in H.M.S Rattlesnake to Sydney.