Memorials and Other Papers — Volume 1De Quincey, Thomas
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Memorials and Other Papers — Volume 1
De Quincey, Thomas
English essays
Though neither giving nor accepting invitations for the first two years
of my residence, never but once had I reason to complain of a sneer,
or indeed any allusion whatever to habits which might be understood to
express poverty. Perhaps even then I had no reason to complain, for
my own conduct in that instance was unwise; and the allusion, though a
personality, and so far ill-bred, might be meant in real kindness. The
case was this: I neglected my dress in one point habitually; that is,
I wore clothes until they were threadbare--partly in the belief that my
gown would conceal their main defects, but much more from carelessness
and indisposition to spend upon a tailor what I had destined for
a bookseller. At length, an official person, of some weight in the
college, sent me a message on the subject through a friend. It was
couched in these terms: That, let a man possess what talents or
accomplishments he might, it was not possible for him to maintain his
proper station, in the public respect, amongst so many servants and
people, servile to external impressions, without some regard to the
elegance of his dress.
A reproof so courteously prefaced I could not take offence at; and at
that time I resolved to spend some cost upon decorating my person. But
always it happened that some book, or set of books,--that passion being
absolutely endless, and inexorable as the grave,--stepped between me and
my intentions; until one day, upon arranging my toilet hastily before
dinner, I suddenly made the discovery that I had no waistcoat (or
_vest_, as it is now called, through conceit or provincialism), which
was not torn or otherwise dilapidated; whereupon, buttoning up my coat
to the throat, and drawing my gown as close about me as possible, I went
into the public "hall" (so is called in Oxford the public eating-room)
with no misgiving. However, I was detected; for a grave man, with a
superlatively grave countenance, who happened on that day to sit next
me, but whom I did not personally know, addressing his friend sitting
opposite, begged to know if he had seen the last Gazette, because he
understood that it contained an order in council laying an interdict
upon the future use of waistcoats. His friend replied, with the same
perfect gravity, that it was a great satisfaction to his mind that his
majesty's government should have issued so sensible an order; which
he trusted would be soon followed up by an interdict on breeches,
they being still more disagreeable to pay for. This said, without the
movement on either side of a single muscle, the two gentlemen passed to
other subjects; and I inferred, upon the whole, that, having detected
my manoeuvre, they wished to put me on my guard in the only way open to
them. At any rate, this was the sole personality, or equivocal allusion
of any sort, which ever met my ear during the years that I asserted my
right to be as poor as I chose. And, certainly, my censors were right,
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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