As most biographers of Mrs. Julia Ward Howe dwell on her other gifts
as philanthropist, poet, and worker for the equality of women with
men, I call attention to her effervescent, brilliant wit. Julia Ward
Howe was undeniably witty. Her concurrence with a dilapidated
bachelor, who retained little but his conceit, was excellent. He said:
"It is time now for me to settle down as a married man, but I want so
much; I want youth, health, wealth, of course; beauty, grace--" "Yes,"
she interrupted sympathetically, "you poor man, you do want them all."
Of a conceited young man airing his disbelief at length in a magazine
article, she said: "Charles evidently thinks he has invented atheism."
After dining with a certain family noted for their chilling manners
and lofty exclusiveness, she hurried to the house of a jolly friend,
and, seating herself before the glowing fire, sought to regain a
natural warmth, explaining: "I have spent three hours with the Mer de
Glace, the Tete-Noire, and the Jungfrau, and am nearly frozen."
Pathos and humour as twins are exemplified by her tearful horror over
the panorama of Gettysburg, and then by her saying, when urged by Mrs.
Livermore to dine with her: "O no! my dear, it's quarter past two, and
Mr. Howe will be wild if he does not get--not his burg--but his
dinner."
Mrs. Howe's wit never failed her. I once told her I was annoyed by
seeing in big headlines in the morning's paper, "Kate Sanborn
moralizes," giving my feeble sentiments on some subject which must
have been reported by a man whom I met for the first time the evening
before at a reception, though I was ignorant of the fact that I was
being interviewed. She comforted me by saying: "But after all, how
much better that was than if he had announced, 'Kate Sanborn
demoralizes.'" Or when Charles Sumner refusing to meet some friends of
hers at dinner explained languidly: "Really, Julia, I have lost all my
interest in individuals." She retorted, "Why, Charles, God hasn't got
as far as that yet!" Once walking in the streets of Boston with a
friend she looked up and read on a public building, "Charitable Eye
and Ear Infirmary." She said: "I did not know there were any
charitable eyes and ears in Boston." She showed indomitable courage to
the last. A lady in Boston, who lived opposite Mrs. Howe's home on
Beacon Street, was sitting at a front window one cold morning in
winter, when ice made the steps dangerous. A carriage was driven up to
Mrs. Howe's door to take her to the station to attend a federation at
Louisville. She came out alone, slipped on the second step, and rolled
to the pavement. She was past eighty, but picked herself up with the
quickness of a girl, looked at her windows to see if anyone noticed
it, then entered the carriage and drove away.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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