To talk to young girls is a great pleasure. We always seemed to
understand one another perfectly; I interspersed my subject with
anecdotes and with bits of fun which they cordially appreciated. My aim
was to set before them the essentials of good nature rather than the
formalism of mere etiquette.
A speaker on manners is confronted with many difficulties. She must not
speak of elementary details as if her hearers were ignorant of them, yet
she must enter somewhat into particulars. I thought it perfectly safe to
speak of gum-chewing in public as an odious custom, permissible only to
football players. Alas! One of my hearers always chewed gum while
traveling, to avoid car-sickness!
I often asked the principals whether there were any special points they
wished mentioned. One lady requested me to speak of mimicry, as she had
a pupil much given to it. I willingly did so, quoting from Miss
Edgeworth’s story of “The Mimic.” Unfortunately the girl for whom the
admonition was especially intended was not feeling well. Either the
other girls recognized the culprit or the weight of her own guilt
overwhelmed her. I have a dim vision of a youthful figure reclining in
an anteroom. I was never asked to speak in that school again!
If I had realized all the pitfalls lurking in the path of the speaker on
manners, I should have embarked upon it with a less cheerful heart. But
in all professions we learn by doing. To be “the Missionary of good
manners” has been a pleasure. The principals have been kind and
appreciative hostesses, and I have been truly glad to visit a great
number of schools which afforded attractive homes as well as excellent
educational advantages to the bright-faced, happy young girls of our
country. It has been a privilege to see so much of the flower of young
American womanhood.
Ruth McEnery Stewart has described in her inimitable way the treatment
of the woman speaker in early days. Many of her experiences were also
mine. She apparently preferred to stay with private families, and I
certainly did. The cold isolation of a hotel in a small country town,
the depressing furniture of the bedroom, the unappetizing menu and
service of the dining-room, the chattering drummers in the distance,
these were not at all to my taste.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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