Soon after six o’clock that evening Nancy visited the Cove for the first
time since the fatal quarrel with Jagger. She had thought she would
never see the place again with pleasure—there had been one hour of
bitter repentance when she had vowed that the scene of her folly should
have no existence for her in the future—but she was surprised to find
her heart warm as she looked upon the great crag and saw the jackdaws
wheeling about in the neighbourhood of their nests. The sun would not
set for another hour, but its couch was behind the mountains and Mawm
would see it no more until the morrow, yet there was a wash of amber on
the limestone, and the rock looked genial and friendly. There was
something soul-stirring and at the same time strangely soothing in the
contemplation of the ponderous cliff that faced unmoved the most violent
storms and all the vicissitudes of the years. Cold as it was Nancy sat
down on a rock beside the stream, and the rippling water, murmuring like
an infant on its mother’s lap, turned her thoughts in another direction
and brought the hot blush to her cheeks.
Raising her eyes she became conscious that a man was descending the
lower slope a hundred yards away, and her face lost its colour as she
recognised Jagger, and saw that she was unobserved. She was not afraid
to encounter him, though they had not met in privacy before since her
marriage, and had exchanged scarcely a dozen words; rather, her senses
were numbed and she watched him incuriously, as if he had been a bird
that had dropped down to the river to drink; and when she saw him bend
his head and stand motionless, though she knew what his thoughts must
be, no emotion of pity or contempt disturbed her, and she experienced no
desire to steal away and escape his notice. Her feelings were turned to
stone, like the man who stood as rigid as the boulders at his feet.
Even when he wheeled round and came towards her with his eyes still on
the ground; when she knew that she must inevitably be discovered, her
pulse beat no more quickly; but when he brushed against her dress, and
uttered a startled exclamation of recognition as his eyes leaped to her
face she smiled.
“I’ve been watching you this last five minutes,” she said in a calm
voice, but with the weary intonation of a care-worn woman.
He was much more at a loss for words than she, yet he recovered his
self-possession in a moment.
“I’ve never been here since that day,” he began; and the girl nodded.
“Nor me, neither,” she said; “but I’m glad I came.”
“Are you? I was wondering if I hadn’t better have stayed away; if I
hadn’t better cross t’ Cove off t’ map and have done with it. It hurts,
Nancy! It’ll always hurt!”
“Hurts!” she answered with an emphasis of mockery. “Your hurt is just an
empty place, a bit of an ache, same as when you’ve fasted too long. _My_
hurt is a serpent ’at I’ve taken of my own free will and pressed to my
bosom, and it bites deeper every day.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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