United States -- History -- Civil War, 1861-1865 -- Fiction
Thus he blinded himself in these vain, silly vaporings, the result of a
false training and the reading of stilted romances. The thought of
studying the girl's character, of doing and being in some degree what
would be agreeable to her, never occurred to him. That kind of good
sense rarely does occur to the egotistical, who often fairly exasperate
those whom they would please by utter blindness to the simple things
which ARE pleasing. Miss Lou had read more old romances than he, but
she speedily outgrew the period in which she was carried away by the
fantastic heroes described. They became in her fancy the other extreme
of the matter-of-fact conditions in which her uncle and aunt had lived,
and as we have seen, she longed to know the actual world, to meet with
people who did not seem alien to her young and natural sympathies. Each
new character she met became a kind of revelation to her. She was the
opposite pole of the society belle, whose eyes have wearied of
humanity, who knows little and cares less for anything except her
mirrored image. With something of the round-eyed curiosity and interest
of a child, she looked at every new face, asking herself, "What is he
like?" not whether he will like and admire me, although she had not a
little feminine pleasure in discovering that strangers were inclined to
do this. Her disapproval of Maynard arose chiefly from the feeling that
his gallantry at such a time, with the dead and dying all about them,
was "more shocking than a game of cards on Sunday." She regarded his
attentions, glances, tones, as mere well-bred persiflage, indulged in
for his own amusement, and she put him down as a trifler for his pains.
That he, as she would phrase it, "was just smitten without any rhyme or
reason" seemed preposterous. She had done nothing for him as she had
for Scoville. The friendly or the frankly admiring looks of strangers,
the hearty gratitude and goodwill of the wounded, she could accept with
as much pleasure as any of her sex; but she had not yet recognized that
type of man who looks at a pretty woman and is disposed to make love to
her at once. "Why does Captain Maynard stare at me so?" she asked
herself, "when I don't care a thistle for him and never will. Why
should I care? Why should he care? Does he think I'm silly and shallow
enough to be amused by this kind of thing when that brave old colonel
is dying across the hall?"
It was a relief to her to escape from him and Whately and to visit even
poor Waldo, dying also, as she believed. "Dr. Ackley," she said, "you
may trust me to give him his food now every two hours. I won't break
down again."
"You did not break down, Miss Baron. All my nurses have their hours
off. Why shouldn't you? I reckon," he added, smiling, "you'll have to
obey my orders like the rest. I will go with you again on this visit."
To her the youth seemed ghastlier than ever, but the expression of
gladness in his eyes was unchanged.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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