British -- India -- Fiction; India -- Fiction; Inheritance and succession -- Fiction
Now when lovers fall to talking hand in hand it is proper, even in a
novel, to avert one's head and smile, saying that the conversation can
have no possible interest to outsiders. Or, if a sentence or two be
suggested, it is necessary to insist that love, divine love, can only
find its first expression in mere foolishness. Belle and Philip
therefore could evidently not have been lovers, for they talked
serious and sound good sense while the year-old Jack with his wide,
wistful eyes lay in his mother's arms and listened to it all. What was
it to him if more than once a reluctant tear fell on his tiny wrinkled
hands, and more than once Philip's voice trembled and then stopped a
while? What were such emotions to a life which had come into the world
barred from them forever? For Belle's child would never be as other
children are; so much was certain; whether he would ever need her care
more than another's was yet to be seen. But it was strange, was it
not? she seemed to hear herself saying in a calm voice, the steadiness
of which surprised her even at the time, that poor Dick's legacy had
gone to a hospital for just such poor little God-stricken children.
"Don't, Belle,--don't, for pity's sake,--I can't bear it." That had
been the man's cry, bringing home to her the fact that she and Philip
had changed places. In the old days a duty had lain between them; a
duty lay between them now. Why had she seen evil and shame in this
man's love then, and yet find none in it now? Then he had been calm,
and she had fretted. Now with another man's child in her arms, and
just the same love in her heart, she had the decision, and he the
restless pain. In those days no thought of such love as deals in
marriage had ever arisen between them; but now Philip had come all the
way from India full of a man's determination to end the story in what
the world said was the only possible, natural, or moral ending to any
love-story. And on such stories as theirs the worldly verdict runs
thus: they had loved each other when they could not marry, which was
very wrong; but a kindly Providence having removed the unnecessary
husband, they could marry, which set everything right.
The mirk and fog settled very closely round them as they sate by the
fire; closer on Philip than on Belle, for it was his turn to be scared
by the phantom of foregone conclusions. What he had strenuously denied
when the position ran counter to his pride, seemed true enough now
that it joined issue with it. He loved Belle, so of course he must
want to marry her. The two things were synonymous; when, of course,
there was a possibility of getting married. Yet Belle, even with tears
in her eyes, could smile as she told him that her first thought in
life lay in her arms; that she could not even give him hope in the
future, or bid him wait, since the waiting might be forever.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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