Modern Eloquence: Vol II, After-Dinner Speeches E-O
General
Modern Eloquence: Vol II, After-Dinner Speeches E-O
Speeches, addresses, etc.
Most of us who sit at this table, judging from the opportunities I have
had of hearing them discourse, fulfil the requirement of Mr. Disraeli's
great traveller in that they have seen more than they have remembered
and remembered more than they have seen. [Laughter.] But I doubt if in
all their experiences they ever sat in a more genial and attractive
company than this. We have here in this year of peace the chosen
representatives of ten nations, with all the romance of the sea, the
splendid histories and traditions of their countries, and their own
personal distinction and fame to make them welcome and interesting.
Already have you conquered the land, and from the time you effected a
lodgment at Fortress Monroe until you are hull down on the horizon, on
your homeward voyages, your progress will prove to have been a
triumphant march into the hearts and homes of the people. [Applause.]
You have stores of wisdom and most agreeable experiences to accumulate.
Judging from press reports you may have thought you met a fair type of
the girls of America at Hampton Roads. [Laughter.] Wait till the
wonderful resources of this country in this its richest and unparalleled
product are spread before you. [Laughter.] Then you will not wonder at
the mysterious power of Helen of Troy, who set nations by the ears, or
the fascination of the Queen of the Nile, who made heroes forget their
duty and their homes. If you should take any for themselves, alone, we
should commend your choice, and though parting with them reluctantly,
should wish you God-speed. But if their money should be your object we
are just now objecting to the exportation of gold and trying to maintain
our reserves. [Laughter.]
Whatever your nationality, you will find a large and prosperous
contingent of it in this city, the majority of whose municipal officers,
however, belong to that race which looks to Mr. Gladstone as its
saviour, and believes that when an Irishman dies it's because there is
an angel short. [Great laughter.] You will find here a wonderful power
of brag which develops as you seek the setting sun. Some inquiring
spirits will be moved to ask you what you think of this country, and, if
you visit the World's Fair some adventurous person may ask your opinion
of Chicago. It is needless to say that a favorable opinion cannot be too
highly colored, and if tinted with vermilion, will conduce to the
pleasure of your stay. [Laughter.] You will have little opportunity to
admire the wonders of our natural scenery save at Niagara. You will be
able to appreciate the reply of an American Naval officer to an English
friend in Italy when each had been maintaining the superiority of his
own country. Finally the grand spectacle of Mount Vesuvius in eruption,
throwing its brilliant rays across the Bay of Naples, burst upon their
astonished gaze.
"Now, look at that," said the Englishman. "You haven't got anything in
America that comes anywhere near that."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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