How delicate are the tender shoots unfolded layer by layer. Of what a
whiteness is the last baby one of all, of what a sweetness his flavor.
It is well that this should be the last rite of the meal--_finis coronat
opus_--so that we may go straight on to the business of the pipe. Celery
demands a pipe rather than a cigar, and it can be eaten better in an inn
or a London tavern than in the home. Yes, and it should be eaten alone,
for it is the only food which one really wants to hear oneself eat.
Besides, in company one may have to consider the wants of others. Celery
is not a thing to share with any man. Alone in your country inn you may
call for the celery; but if you are wise you will see that no other
traveler wanders into the room. Take warning from one who has learnt a
lesson. One day I lunched alone at an inn, finishing with cheese and
celery. Another traveler came in and lunched too. We did not speak--I
was busy with my celery. From the other end of the table he reached
across for the cheese. That was all right! it was the public cheese. But
he also reached across for the celery--my private celery for which I
owed. Foolishly--you know how one does--I had left the sweetest and
crispest shoots till the last, tantalizing myself pleasantly with the
thought of them. Horror! to see them snatched from me by a stranger. He
realized later what he had done and apologized, but of what good is an
apology in such circumstances? Yet at least the tragedy was not without
its value. Now one remembers to lock the door.
Yes, I can face the winter with calm. I suppose I had forgotten what it
was really like. I had been thinking of the winter as a horrid wet,
dreary time fit only for professional football. Now I can see other
things--crisp and sparkling days, long pleasant evenings, cheery fires.
Good work shall be done this winter. Life shall be lived well. The end
of the summer is not the end of the world. Here's to October--and,
waiter, some more celery.
"A CLERGYMAN"
_By_ MAX BEERBOHM
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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