She drew her chair from the front of the box out of public view, and,
turning toward Camors, continued: “You wish to know what I am, what I
feel, and what I think; or rather, you wish to know simply whether I
dream of love? Very well, I dream only of that! Have I lovers, or have I
not? I have none, and never shall have, but that will not be because
of my virtue. I believe in nothing, except my own self-esteem and my
contempt of others. The little intrigues, the petty passions, which I
see in the world, make me indignant to the bottom of my soul. It
seems to me that women who give themselves for so little must be base
creatures. As for myself, I remember having said to you one day--it is a
million years since then!--that my person is sacred to me; and to commit
a sacrilege I should wish, like the vestals of Rome, a love as great
as my crime, and as terrible as death. I wept just now during that
magnificent fourth act. It was not because I listened to the most
marvellous music ever heard on this earth; it was because I admire and
envy passionately the superb and profound love of that time. And it is
ever thus--when I read the history of the glorious sixteenth century, I
am in ecstacies. How well those people knew how to love and how to die!
One night of love--then death. That is delightful. Now, cousin, you must
leave me. We are observed. They will believe we love each other, and as
we have not that pleasure, it is useless to incur the penalties. Since
I am still in the midst of the court of Charles Tenth, I pity you, with
your black coat and round hat. Good-night.”
“I thank you very much,” replied Camors, taking the hand she extended to
him coldly, and left the box. He met M. de Campvallon in the passage.
“Parbleu! my dear friend,” said the General, seizing him by the arm.
“I must communicate to you an idea which has been in my brain all the
evening.”
“What idea, General?”
“Well, there are here this evening a number of charming young girls.
This set me to thinking of you, and I even said to my wife that we must
marry you to one of these young women!”
“Oh, General!”
“Well, why not?”
“That is a very serious thing--if one makes a mistake in his
choice--that is everything.”
“Bah! it is not so difficult a thing. Take a wife like mine, who has a
great deal of religion, not much imagination, and no fancies. That is
the whole secret. I tell you this in confidence, my dear fellow!”
“Well, General, I will think of it.”
“Do think of it,” said the General, in a serious tone; and went to join
his young wife, whom he understood so well.
As to her, she thoroughly understood herself, and analyzed her own
character with surprising truth.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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