England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Triangles (Interpersonal relations) -- Fiction
It was a bitter winter, with more rain than snow, more snow than
sunshine, and it seemed to Helen that half her life was spent in
watching for Zebedee's figure bent against the storm as he drove up the
road, while Mildred Caniper lay slackly in her bed. She no longer stared
at the ceiling, for though her body had collapsed, her will had only
wavered, and it was righting itself slowly, and the old thoughts which
had been hunting her for years had not yet overcome her. Like hounds,
they bayed behind, and some day their breath would be on her neck, their
teeth in her flesh, and she would fall to them. This was the threat in
the sound which reached her, soft or loud, as bells are heard in the
wind, and in the meantime she steadied herself with varying arguments.
Said one of these, "The past is over," yet she saw the whole future of
these Canipers as the product of her acts. Reason, unsubdued, refused to
allow her so much power, and she gave in; but she knew that if good
befell the children she could claim no credit; if evil, she would take
all the blame. There remained the comfortable assurance that she had
done her best, and then Miriam's face mocked her as it peeped furtively
round the bedroom door. Thus she was brought back to her starting place,
and finding the circle a giddy one, she determined to travel on it no
more, and with her old rigidity, she kept this resolve. It was, however,
less difficult than it would once have been, for her mind was weary and
glad of an excuse to take the easiest path. She lay in bed according to
Zebedee's bidding, hardly moving under the clothes, and listening to the
noises in the house. She was astonished by their number and
significance. All through the night, cooling coals ticked in the grate
or dropped on to the hearth; sometimes a mouse scratched or cheeped in
the walls, and on the landing there were movements for which Helen could
have accounted: Mr. Pinderwell, more conscious of his loss in the
darkness, and unaware that his children had taken form, was moving from
door to door and scraping his hands across the panels. Often the wind
howled dolorously round the house while rain slashed furiously at the
windows, and there were stealthy nights when snow wound a white muffler
against the noises of the world. The clock in the hall sent out clear
messages as to the passing of man's division of time, and at length
there came the dawn, aged and eternally young, certain of itself, with a
grey amusement for man's devices. Before that, Helen had opened her door
and gone in soft slippers to light the kitchen fire, and presently
Rupert was heard to whistle as he dressed. Meanwhile, as though it
looked for something, the light spread itself in Mildred Caniper's room
and she attuned her ears for the different noises of the day. There was
Miriam's laughter, more frequent than it had been before her stepmother
was tied to bed, and provocative of a wry smile from the invalid; there
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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