"Them are little bits o' things--little bits o' mules--dunkies, your honour, as carries the cabbages and purraters about; and I told him, says I, Pat Crawley, says I, de'il a bit of a lock there is to it--that's the door, your honour: an Pat, says I, buy your own lock, says I, or her'll be off may be; and he woudn't, your honour, and so she was--" "Was what?" "_Off_, your honour, sure enough--that's the mule, your honour, bad luck to her!" One of the patrole said he had been called in by Mr. Pat Crawley, upon the discovery of his loss, and he had examined Mr. O'Callaghan's premises in consequence; and as there was no other way from the stable but through Mr. O'Callaghan's _house_, he was of opinion that the mule could not have been taken away without Mr. O'Callaghan's connivance. Mr. O'Callaghan declared he knew nothing whatever of it, and his worship might have a six months' _carrakter_ of him any day in the week. His worship, however, told Mr. O'Callaghan that he must either find the mule or remain in custody; and he left the office under the surveillance of the officer and Mr. Pat Crawley himself. They adjourned to a neighbouring public house, whence Mr. O'Callaghan despatched a messenger of his own to St. Giles's, and in two hours after the mule was brought down to the office and safely re-delivered to Mr. Pat Crawley--and thereupon Mr. Phelim O'Callaghan was discharged; upon which he exclaimed--"Bad luck to the mule for _getting_ out of _that_! and long life to your honour for _letting_ me out of _this_!" THE TEMPLAR AND THE COOK. This was a matter of assault, battery, riot, and false imprisonment, between Theodosius Todd, Esq. and Mr. John Cutmore. Mr. Theodosius Todd is a gentleman, it is said, of considerable property; rather diminutive in stature, and very fond of cold boiled ham. Mr. John Cutmore is a vender of cold boiled ham, and many other good things, at a large house near Temple Bar--a house well known to many a kitchenless bachelor. Mr. Theodosius Todd having complained to the magistrate that he had been violently assaulted by Mr. John Cutmore, the magistrate granted his warrant to bring Mr. Cutmore before him, when Mr. Cutmore pleaded _justifiable collaring_, and thereupon issue was joined.