Motherhood and the Relationships of the SexesHartley, C. Gasquoine (Catherine Gasquoine)
Philosophy
Motherhood and the Relationships of the Sexes
Hartley, C. Gasquoine (Catherine Gasquoine)
Mothers; Sex; Women -- Social and moral questions
The whole question of any sexual relationships outside of marriage
in the past has been left in the gutter, so to speak, in darkness
and concealment. This would be changed. It is the results that have
almost always followed these irregular unions that have branded them
as anti-social acts. But the desertion of women, which has arisen from
the conditions of secrecy under which they now exist, would be put to
an end. One reason why extra conjugal relationships are discredited is
because the difficulties placed around them are so numerous that, as a
rule, only the weak, the foolish, and the irresponsible undertake these
partnerships. Make these partnerships honourable and honourable men and
women will enter into them. I do not see how we can forbid or treat with
bitterness any union that is openly entered into and in which the duties
undertaken are faithfully fulfilled. It is our attitude of blame that has
made this impossible.
I can anticipate an objection that will probably be raised. Why, I
shall be asked, if sexual relationships are to be acknowledged outside
of marriage, preserve marriage at all? I have answered this question
sufficiently. Monogamous marriage will be maintained because the great
majority of women and men want it to be maintained. I have affirmed
before my own belief in the monogamic union: the ideal marriage is that
of the man and woman who have dedicated themselves to each other for
the life of both, faithfully together to fulfil the duties of family
life. This is the true monogamy; this is the marriage which I regard as
sanctified. But I, regarding it as a holy state, would preserve it for
those suited for the binding duties of the individual home so intimately
connected with it.
And I do disavow the sanctity of many professedly monogamous marriages
that are maintained only with the support of prostitution and clandestine
loves. Squalid intrigues have been the shadow of the old, narrow moral
code. The contract-partnerships I have suggested will do nothing to
change the sanctity of any true marriages. And the answer I would give
to those who fear an increase of immorality from any openly recognised
provision for sexual partnerships outside of permanent marriage is,
that no deliberate change made in the future in our sexual conduct can
conceivably make moral conditions worse than they have been in the recent
past. As a matter of fact, every form of irregular union has existed and
does exist to-day, but shamefully and hidden. It is certain that they
will continue, and that their number will be increased.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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