England -- Fiction; Fox hunting -- Fiction; Humorous stories; Hunting stories
'True,' replied Bragg, 'true; but my Lord Swellcove is one of a thousand.
See how many have failed for one that has succeeded. Why, even my Lord
Scamperdale was 'bliged to give it up, and no man rides harder than my Lord
Scamperdale--always goes as if he had a spare neck in his pocket. But he
couldn't 'unt a pack of 'ounds. Your gen'l'men 'untsmen are all very well
on fine scentin' days when everything goes smoothly and well, and the
'ounds are tied to their fox, as it were; but see them in difficulties--a
failing scent, 'ounds pressed upon by the field, fox chased by a dog, storm
in the air, big brook to get over to make a cast. Oh, sir, sir, it makes
even me, with all my acknowledged science and experience, shudder to think
of the ordeal one undergoes!'
'Indeed,' exclaimed Mr. Puffington, staring, and beginning to think it
mightn't be quite so easy as it looked.
'I don't wish, sir, to dissuade you, sir, from the attempt, sir,' continued
Mr. Bragg; 'far from it, sir--for he, sir, who never makes an effort, sir,
never risks a failure, sir, and in great attempts, sir, 'tis glorious to
fail, sir'; Mr. Bragg sawing away at his hat as he spoke, and then sticking
the fox-head handle of his whip under his chin.
Puff stood mute for some seconds.
'My Lord Scamperdale,' continued Mr. Bragg, scrutinizing our friend
attentively, 'was as likely a man, sir, as ever I see'd, sir, to make an
'untsman, for he had a deal of ret (rat) ketchin' cunnin' about him, and,
as I said before, didn't care one dim for his neck, but a more signal
disastrous failure was never recognized. It was quite lamentable to witness
his proceeding.'
'How?' asked Mr. Puffington.
'How, sir?' repeated Mr. Bragg; 'why, sir, in all wayses. He had no dog
language, to begin with--he had little idea of making a cast--no science,
no judgement, no manner--no nothin'--I'm dim'd if ever I see'd sich a mess
as he made.'
Puff looked unutterable things.
'He never did no good, in fact, till I fit him with Frostyface. _I_ taught
Frosty,' continued Mr. Bragg. 'He whipped in to me when I 'unted the Duke
of Downeybird's 'ounds--nice, 'cute, civil chap he was--of all my
pupils--and I've made some first-rate 'untsmen, I'm dim'd if I don't think
Frostyface does me about as much credit as any on 'em. Ah, sir,' continued
Mr. Bragg, with a shake of his head, 'take my word for it, sir, there's
nothin' like a professional. S-c-e-u-s-e me, sir,' added he, with a low bow
and a sort of military salute of his hat; 'but dim all gen'l'men 'untsmen,
say I.'
Mr. Bragg had talked himself into several good places. Lord Reynard's and
the Duke of Downeybird's among others. He had never been able to keep any
beyond his third season, his sauce or his science being always greater than
the sport he showed. Still he kept up appearances, and was nothing daunted,
it being a maxim of his that 'as one door closed another opened.'
Mr. Puffington's was the door that now opened for him.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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