England -- Fiction; Fox hunting -- Fiction; Humorous stories; Hunting stories
Jack was highly enraged, and proceeded to squint his eyes inside out, and
abuse all railways, and chairmen, and directors, and secretaries, and
clerks, and porters, vowing that railways were the greatest nuisances under
the sun--that they were a perfect impediment instead of a facility to
travelling--and declared that formerly a gentleman had nothing to do but
order his four horses, and have them turned out at every stage as he came
up, instead of being stopped in the _ridicklous_ manner he then was; and he
strutted and stamped about the station as if he would put a stop to the
whole line. His vehemence and big talk operated favourably on the Cockney
station-master, who, thinking he must be a duke, or some great man, began
to consider how to get him forwarded. It being only a thinly populated
district--though there was a station equal to any mercantile emergency,
indeed to the requirements of the whole county--he ran the resources of the
immediate neighbourhood through his mind, and at length was obliged to
admit--humbly and respectfully--that he really was afraid Martha Muggins's
donkey was the only available article.
Jack fumed and bounced at the very mention of such a thing, vowing that it
was a downright insult to propose it; and he was so bumptious that the
station-master, who had nothing to gain by the transaction, sought the
privacy of the electric telegraph office, and left him to vent the balance
of his wrath upon the porters.
Of course they could do nothing more than the king of their little colony
had suggested; and finding there was no help for it, Mr. Spraggon at last
submitted to the humiliation, and set off to follow young Muggins with his
bag on the donkey, in his best top-boots, worn under his trousers--an
unpleasant operation to any one, but especially to a man like Jack, who
preferred wearing his tops out against the flaps of his friends' saddles,
rather than his soles by walking upon them. However, necessity said yes;
and cocking his flat hat jauntily on his head, he stuck a cheroot in his
mouth, and went smoking and swaggering on, looking--or rather
squinting--bumptiously at everybody he met, as much as to say, 'Don't
suppose I'm walking from necessity! I've plenty of tin.'
The third cheroot brought Jack and his suite within sight of Hanby House.
Mr. Puffington had about got through all the fuss of his preparations,
arranged the billets of the guests and of those scarcely less important
personages--their servants, allotted the stables, and rehearsed the wines,
when a chance glance through the gaily furnished drawing-room window
discovered Jack trudging up the trimly kept avenue.
'Here's that nasty Spraggon,' exclaimed he, eyeing Jack dragging his legs
along, adding, 'I'll be bound to say he'll never think of wiping his filthy
feet if I don't go to meet him.'
So saying, Puffington rushed to the entrance, and crowning himself with a
white wide-awake, advanced cheerily to do so.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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