England -- Fiction; Fox hunting -- Fiction; Humorous stories; Hunting stories
Mr. Jogglebury Crowdey did not hunt from any of these motives, and it would
puzzle a conjurer to make out why he hunted; indeed, the members of the
different hunts he patronized--for he was one of the run-about,
non-subscribing sort--were long in finding out. It was observed that he
generally affected countries abounding in large woods, such as Stretchaway
Forest, Hazelbury Chase, and Oakington Banks, into which he would dive with
the greatest avidity. At first people thought he was a very keen hand,
anxious to see a fox handsomely found, if he could not see him handsomely
finished, against which latter luxury his figure and activity, or want of
activity, were somewhat opposed. Indeed, when we say that he went by the
name of the Woolpack, our readers will be able to imagine the style of man
he was: long-headed, short-necked, large-girthed, dumpling-legged little
fellow, who, like most fat men, made himself dangerous by compressing a
most unreasonable stomach into a circumscribed coat, each particular button
of which looked as if it was ready to burst off, and knock out the eye of
any one who might have the temerity to ride alongside of him. He was a
puffy, wheezy, sententious little fellow, who accompanied his parables with
a snort into a large finely plaited shirt-frill, reaching nearly up to his
nose. His hunting-costume consisted of a black coat and waistcoat, with
white moleskin breeches, much cracked and darned about the knees and other
parts, as nether garments made of that treacherous stuff often are. His
shapeless tops, made regardless of the refinements of 'right and left,'
dangled at his horse's sides like a couple of stable-buckets; and he
carried his heavy iron hammer-headed whip over his shoulder like a flail.
But we are drawing his portrait instead of saying why he hunted. Well,
then, having married Mrs. Springwheat's sister, who was always boasting to
Mrs. Crowdey what a loving, doting husband Springey was after hunting, Mrs.
Crowdey had induced Crowdey to try his hand, and though soon satisfied that
he hadn't the slightest taste for the sport, but being a great man for what
he called gibbey-sticks, he hunted for the purpose of finding them. As we
said before, he generally appeared at large woodlands, into which he would
ride with the hounds, plunging through the stiffest clay, and forcing his
way through the strongest thickets, making observations all the while of
the hazels, and the hollies, and the blackthorns, and, we are sorry to say,
sometimes of the young oaks and ashes, that he thought would fashion into
curious-handled walking-sticks; and these he would return for at a future
day, getting them with as large clubs as possible, which he would cut into
the heads of beasts, or birds, or fishes, or men. At the time of which we
are writing, he had accumulated a vast quantity--thousands; the garret at
the top of his house was quite full, so were most of the closets, while the
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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