Mr. World and Miss Church-Member: A Twentieth Century AllegoryHarris, W. S. (William Shuler)
Religion
Mr. World and Miss Church-Member: A Twentieth Century Allegory
Harris, W. S. (William Shuler)
Christian fiction
When Mr. World took a seat the large committee was engaged in a warm
debate over a certain piece of ground occupying a space midway between
the King’s Highway and the Broad Highway. This eligible site had been
used for holding church-festivals to raise funds for the maintenance
of gospel work. A few wealthy friends of Satan wanted this location
to erect on it a club-house wherein they might revel and carouse as
they wished.
The question arose among the members of the committee as to which of
the two uses would best subserve the purpose of their master who held
a claim on the land.
The chairman arose, after listening to the arguments at length, and
addressed the audience with great coolness and deliberation: “Most
worthy members of this committee,” commenced he, “you have spoken many
words of truth this day. Your interest in this matter only shows your
loyalty to our cause. ‘Club-House or Festival?’ that is the question.
Surely we cannot dispense with either, but rather must we maintain
both at any cost. As for this place in question, I am decidedly in
favor of holding it for the use of the church. The Club-House will
find a location elsewhere, but this ground is so favorably situated
for church-merchandising that I urge you to hold it for such purposes.
Have we not seen how eagerly the two classes mingle here? This place,
being so accessible to all parties, makes it possible for the church
to gather larger numbers and thereby reap greater financial results--
which is the principal object of the church in holding these delightful
affairs. Since the church is well supplied with everything it needs
except money, let us do it a favor by rendering some assistance in
that direction. Then we may reasonably expect that the church will,
in return, do us a favor by being less hostile to our methods of
operation, which, as you will admit, are highly honorable.”
This speech had the desired effect. A resolution was quickly passed
in harmony with the opinion of the chairman.
The curiosity of Mr. World was now satisfied, for he had seen this
famous committee in session. Therefore he repaired to the waiting-
room, and while conducting Miss Church-Member from the building their
attention was arrested by this announcement written in bold letters
near the exit:
ANY ONE WISHING REFRESHMENTS CAN FIND THEM AT THE FESTIVAL ON THE
CHURCH GROUNDS.
“How does that announcement suit you?” interrogated Mr. World.
“It comes at an opportune time,” she answered, her face brightening,
“I had been hoping that we might soon have lunch.”
They had gone but a few steps from the door when they heard cheery
voices and strains.
Here the Church receives money for souls from the Devil, while the
Devil gets souls for money from the Church of music lending attractive
life to the festival. Urged on by the thought of a pleasant hour, they
quickened their pace unconsciously and were soon within sight of the
grounds.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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