“It comes to the same thing. Will you hear what I have to say--will you
listen to me? It may be nothing to you, but it is everything in the
world to me!”
Lucy grew crimson red, then pale, then red again. “Can you say it here?”
she asked, in a scarcely audible voice.
“Anywhere, wherever you will, no place can change what I have to say;
but rather alone,” he cried, growing so agitated that his words were
half inarticulate too. Lady Curtis got up with a sigh to leave them. But
Lucy felt the atmosphere of the room, the sense of constraint in the
very air, stifle her. She sprang up hurriedly. “Stay here, mamma, I will
go out with Lewis,” she said, scarcely knowing what she said. It was
quite unawares that this unconscious familiar utterance of his name
anticipated everything more she could say on her side, as his appeal had
forestalled everything on his. She caught up her hat and a shawl as she
went out, then turned to him with a question in her eyes--was it a
question? She knew as well as he did, and he knew as well she did. Had
it not all been settled years ago?
Lady Curtis was very restless when she was thus left behind. She had
given her unwilling assent only on hard conditions--that nothing more
than this one interview should at present pass between the lovers--that
no formal engagement should be made or correspondence begun, and nothing
as yet be said to Sir John. She was to “manage” him as best she could,
taking her opportunity; nothing was to be hurried or forced. They were
to wait the next change in the drama of Arthur’s fortunes. If anything
happened in that, Sir John might be more easy to manage. But though she
set up all these imaginary defences round her, Lady Curtis knew very
well that in ceding one point she had virtually ceded all. How keep two
persons who understood each other, who were faithful to each other, who
could neither be coerced nor frightened, apart? the thing was
impossible. It might be done for a time making everybody uncomfortable,
but the means of permanently afflicting Lucy, whom her parents loved,
who was more precious to them than all the rest of the world! This was
folly she knew. Sir John might resist, and he would regret--but yield he
must if they insisted. And what could Lucy do else? Lady Curtis was, as
she avowed to herself, with a smile and a tear, a little in love with
Lewis too. He was so kind, so true, so good a stay and support to all
belonging to him; he was--what need to prolong descriptions--Lewis; and
had not all been said in that word for years? Of course Lucy would
insist: not undutifully, not untenderly, but steadily, and to the end of
her days; there would be no passion, no tragedy--but she would never
change. Her mother knew this as well as she knew her child’s name, and
began to consider, as she wandered about restless, wondering when they
would come back again, wondering what they could find to say to each
other so long, wondering at Durant’s determination and Lucy’s courage,
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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