Divorce -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Marriage -- Fiction
stood and would stand the effect on those other lives--effects great or
small, transitory or permanent, but in the mass amounting to a
considerable sum of human experience, owing its shape and colour in the
end to her own action.
Though she had not loved Bertie Merriam, their intercourse, his
revelation of himself, and the manner of their parting had deeply
affected her. For the first time she had seen the enemy, convention--the
established order, the proper thing--in a form which she could not only
understand, but with which she was obliged to sympathize. What had
seemed to her hard dogmatism in her husband and Attlebury, and a mere
caste-respectability, external, narrow, and cowardly, in the denizens of
Woburn Square, took on a new shape when it was embodied in the loyalty
of a soldier and found its expression, not in demands upon another, but
in the sacrifice of self to an obligation and an ideal. Liberty had been
her god, and she would not desert the shrine at which Shaylor's Patch
had taught her to worship; but Merriam had shown her, had brought home
to her through the penetrating appeal of vivid emotion, that there were
other deities worthy of offerings and noble worshippers who made them.
It was a great revulsion of feeling which drove her to declare that
Merriam could do no other than sacrifice his hope of her to his sworn
service and to the regiment.
In justifying, or more than justifying, himself, in some sort Merriam
pleaded for Cyril Maxon. Winnie held herself to a stricter account of
her dealings with her husband. When she understood why he had deviated
from his strict conviction, and how it was likely that the deviation
would be in vain, she was anxious to rid her soul of any sense of
responsibility. She recalled just what she had said, as near as she
could; she listened carefully to Mrs. Lenoir's account of her own
conversation with Lady Rosaline.
"Do you think that we influenced her--that we stopped her?" she asked.
"Because I wouldn't have done that on purpose."
"I certainly wouldn't have encouraged her on purpose. And, if you ask
me, I think that our attitude of--well, of reserve (Mrs. Lenoir was
smiling) will have its weight--combined, perhaps, with Sir Axel's
attractions."
"I'm sorry. If Cyril does want her, and it doesn't come off, he'll hate
me worse than ever."
"He won't guess you've had anything to do with it--supposing you have."
"No, but he'll trace the whole thing back to me, of course. He'll blame
me for having forced him into acting against his conscience."
"Tut, tut, he shouldn't have such a silly conscience," said Mrs. Lenoir
easily. To her, consciences were not things to be treated with an
exaggerated punctilio. "After all, if she'd asked you right out, what
would you have said?"
"I should have refused to say anything, of course."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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