Pearl said to-day that Tumm was the Bumpschus jester. I protested, but it was just one of those little cuts which make a woman all the more lovely to those for whom she has only balm. I think of him, I told her, as the minstrel of the house, at his type-writer all day long, singing of its glories, of the riches of the master and the beauty of the daughter, of the greatness of her lover and of their love--for under a hundred flaring black heads the world has been told that this is a love-match. A safety match, said Pearl, blowing a smoke ring solemnly--she was evidently thinking of his Grace's debts. Singing, I went on, for I always ignore these little jibes of hers, singing and carolling of the vastness of the trousseau and the value of the presents, of the smartness of the bridesmaids and the colors of their dresses; singing of the ushers, of their waistcoats, their spats, their gloves, and boutonnières; of the music at the wedding, of the breakfast later, with its menu and its wines. Fortunate the world that every word that Tumm, the minstrel, sings is caught upon the manifold, seized by the educating press, illuminated with pen-sketch and photograph, and sent forth to be read by the millions in the outer darkness! Fortunate, indeed, said Pearl, for she always agrees with me in the end. Sometimes I suspect that because she can always agree with me, she declined the proffered heart and hand of his Grace, and now is perfectly contented with the humbler rôle of maid of honor at the great wedding of the season. I must confess that I was surprised that Ethel Bumpschus asked Pearl to accompany her to the altar, but then the reason was very evident when I saw the list of the wedding-party. Ethel is going in for beauty. No expense is being spared on flowers and music, and she must have been conscious of the discord created in the first bars of many a grand sweet song by a procession of exquisitely gowned ancients moving slowly down the aisle at the heels of a lovely bride. Now Ethel is not beautiful, but she will have the advantage of a veil.