My Double Life: The Memoirs of Sarah BernhardtBernhardt, Sarah
General
My Double Life: The Memoirs of Sarah Bernhardt
Bernhardt, Sarah
Actors -- France -- Biography; Bernhardt, Sarah, 1844-1923
I felt, without exactly defining it, a slight contempt for these
pitiless judges. Since then I have very often thought of that trial of
mine, and I have come to the conclusion that individuals who are kind,
intelligent, and compassionate become less estimable when they are
together. The feeling of personal irresponsibility arouses their evil
instincts, and the fear of ridicule chases away their good ones.
When I had recovered my will power I began my fable again, determined
not to mind what happened. My voice was more liquid on account of the
emotion, and the desire to make myself heard caused it to be more
resonant.
There was silence, and before I had finished my fable the little bell
rang. I bowed and came down the few steps from the platform, thoroughly
exhausted. M. Auber stopped me as I was passing by the table.
“Well, little girl,” he said, “that was very good indeed. M. Provost and
M. Beauvallet both want you in their class.”
I recoiled slightly when he told me which was M. Beauvallet, for he was
the “ventriloquist” who had given me such a fright.
“Well, which of these two gentlemen should you prefer?” he asked.
I did not utter a word, but pointed to M. Provost.
“That’s all right. Get your handkerchief out, my poor Beauvallet, and I
shall entrust this child to you, my dear Provost.”
I understood, and, wild with joy, I exclaimed, “Then I have passed?”
“Yes, you have passed; and there is only one thing I regret, and that is
that such a pretty voice should not be for music.”
I did not hear anything else, for I was beside myself with joy. I did
not stay to thank any one, but bounded to the door.
“_Mon petit Dame!_ Mademoiselle, I have passed!” I exclaimed, and when
they shook hands and asked me no end of questions I could only reply,
“Oh, it’s quite true. I have passed, I have passed!”
I was surrounded and questioned.
“How do you know that you have passed? No one knows beforehand.”
“Yes, yes; I know, though. Monsieur Auber told me. I am to go into
Monsieur Provost’s class. Monsieur Beauvallet wanted me, but his voice
is too loud for me!”
A disagreeable girl exclaimed, “Can’t you stop that? And so they all
want you!” A pretty girl, who was too dark, though, for my taste, came
nearer and asked me gently what I had recited.
“The fable of the ‘Two Pigeons,’” I replied.
She was surprised, and so was every one; while, as for me, I was wildly
delighted to surprise them all. I tossed my hat on my head, shook my
frock out, and, dragging my two friends along, ran away dancing. They
wanted to take me to the confectioner’s to have something, but I
refused. We got into a cab, and I should have liked to push that cab
along myself. I fancied I saw the words, “I have passed,” written up
over all the shops.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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