My Lords of Strogue, Vol. 3 (of 3): A Chronicle of Ireland, from the Convention to the UnionWingfield, Lewis
History
My Lords of Strogue, Vol. 3 (of 3): A Chronicle of Ireland, from the Convention to the Union
Wingfield, Lewis
Historical fiction; Ireland -- History -- 18th century -- Fiction
My lady loathed herself for the thoughts which held possession of her
mind. When the chancellor brought his news, she concealed the sudden
turbulence within. Strangely enough, the mother's sympathies, even at
that moment, were not for Terence--the son who had escaped the
halter--but for Shane; and a great fear for him leaped up in her
heart, to the crushing out of natural feeling. Terence was snatched
from the grave as by a miracle. A foreboding took strong hold of my
lady's mind that this was for a purpose--that Heaven, not satisfied
with the penance of a lifetime, was determined that she should blab
out to the world the secret which, lying on her bosom, had seared her
life. Oh! why did she not accept her punishment all those years ago,
when the task would not have been so hard? The earth had been no
pleasant place of sojourn to my lady. When she thought of all she had
borne since the old lord's death--of the utter futility of the
penance--she became rebellious, and gnashed her teeth at the simpering
portrait of him who had got off so easily. She rebelled against the
iron sternness of Heaven. She was to bend her proud knees, was
she--and confess? Her whitened hair and ashen cheeks were not to be
taken into account? Very well, then. She defied Heaven; religion was a
delusion and a snare; the Lord of Heaven unduly just. Tossing her
favourite tracts into the fire, she swore she would not be driven to
speak, though the ruin of her soul should be the penalty. At the time
when it was decided that Terence was to die, she spent the long hours
in reverie over the past--in poignant regret that he should have to be
thus sacrificed. She reflected that if she had spoken all those years
ago he would never have joined the popular side--would never have
risked his neck--of that she felt assured; and so she felt in some
sort as though she had herself handed him over to the scrag-boy. It
was an awful thought, and it had weighed down her intellect. But now
came a revulsion. It was not to be so. He was to live as a reproach.
Heaven was hounding her down, so she stood at bay. If Heaven had
accepted the penance of a life without requiring that the original
transgression should be cancelled by confessing it she would gladly
have borne the penance to the end of a long weary existence. But that
the penance should not be accepted in any way as an equivalent, was
maddening to her sense of justice. She bestirred herself; sat no
longer dreaming the days away. The household whispered that my lady
was herself again, that the joy of her son's reprieve was accountable
for the happy change. All thought this save Gillin, who knew her
secret. That excellent person scratched her untidy head with a comb
and pondered. What did the wicked old woman mean to do? There was more
mischief brewing--of that she felt quite sure. Well, Terence was saved
from the gallows by direct interposition from above. He was not
intended to be made a sacrifice, any more than Isaac was when his
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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