All priests, whether they be curés of a small town or hamlet, or
officiating priests of a chapel without a congregation, are inclined
to be a little greedy; the Abbé Remy, modest though he was, had
the sensual side with which nature has endowed the palate of the
ecclesiastic. At first he would not drink more than a few drops of
wine in his water; then he mixed wine and water in equal parts; then,
finally, he decided to drink his wine pure. When Bougainville saw he
had arrived at this point, he rose, and announced that it was time for
him to present himself before the king, to whom he was going to address
the request relative to the poor of Boulogne. In the meantime the two
officers were to keep the Abbé Remy company. As Bougainville had said,
he was absent an hour. In spite of the efforts of the officers the
worthy priest's hopes see-sawed up and down in a way which did credit
to his kindliness of heart.
"Well!" he said, when he caught sight of Bougainville, "what about my
poor people?"
"It is not three hundred livres that the king has given me for them,"
said Bougainville, drawing a roll from his pocket, "but fifty louis!"
"What! Fifty louis?" exclaimed the Abbé Rémy, quite overcome by this
regal bounty; "twelve hundred livres!"
"Twelve hundred livres."
"Impossible!"
"Here they are."
The Abbé Rémy held out his hand.
"But the king has given them to me on one condition."
"What?"
"That you drink to his health."
"Oh, if that is all!"
He held out his glass, into which Bougainville tipped the neck of the
bottle.
"Stop! stop!" said the abbé.
"Come, now!" Bougainville insisted, "half a glass? Well! the king would
not be pleased to see only half a glass drunk to his health."
"Really," the Abbé Rémy said jovially, "twelve hundred livres deserve
a whole glass. Fill it quite full, Antoine; and here's to the king's
health!"
"To the king!" repeated Bougainville.
"Ah!" said the Abbé Rémy, putting his glass on the table, "that is what
one might call a real orgy!... True, it is the first I have taken part
in, and I shall not have the opportunity of a second for a very long
time."
"I tell you what it is...." said Bougainville, resting his elbows on
the table.
"Well?" replied the Abbé Rémy, whose eyes were shining like carbuncles.
"Something you ought to do."
"What is it?"
"You tell me you have never seen the sea."
"Never."
"Well! you ought to come to Havre with me."
"I ... come to Havre with you?... But you are not dreaming of such a
thing as that, Antoine?"
"On the contrary, it is just what I am doing. Have a glass of
champagne?"
"Thanks, I have already drunk too much!"
"Ah! to the health of your poor people ... that is a toast you cannot
resist."
"Yes, but only a drop."
"A drop! When you drank the glass full to the king? Ah! that is not
scriptural, my dear Remy. Our Saviour said: 'The first shall be last
...' A full glass for the poor of Boulogne or none at all."
"Here goes, then, for a full glass; but it is the last."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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