What could I do, alone in my madhouse, deprived of help and liberty?
But I guessed the plots which were hatched at Brussels, and what support
my enemies had obtained in order to triumph over a poor tortured woman.
I saw my only chance of salvation by the side of the unfortunate man who
was enduring martyrdom in the penitentiary of Moellersdorf, for having
endeavoured to save me from an earthly hell and its dishonouring
abysses.
Perhaps our mutual fidelity may astonish some people. Few really
understand that, for certain natures, suffering constitutes a common
bond. Our joys had been ephemeral, our sorrows had been prolonged. We
had been misunderstood, misjudged, defamed and tortured. But we had
reposed our trust and our hope elsewhere than in men. Often the best
have neither the time nor the possibility of knowing and understanding,
and thus they condemn the innocent on the strength of appearances, which
hatred and duplicity know so well how to exploit to their own advantage.
I had been certified "insane" for four years, when the Court of Vienna,
terrified by public outcry, was obliged to abandon one of its victims.
The count was pardoned. No sooner did he regain his freedom than,
fearless of consequences, he began to plan my deliverance! It was indeed
a perilous enterprise, as the Austrian and German police, in default
of a justice which fear of the Press and Parliaments kept somewhat in
restraint, were nevertheless at the orders of my enemies.
I have said, and I again repeat, that it seems incredible that we still
live.
To begin with, my chivalrous defender found himself entangled in the
meshes of the police net, and could not take a single step without being
followed by spies of all descriptions. As for myself, I beheld Koswig
in a state of siege. Lindenhof was surrounded by gendarmes; even the fir
trees afforded them a screen!
Fortified by prayer and hope, I had now become if not accustomed to my
chains at least able to support their weight. Always a lover of Nature,
I revelled in the sylvan solitudes where I was allowed to walk with my
sorrow, of course under the observation of my suite of jailers of both
sexes.
I had only one friend--my dog! Shall I ever see that loyal fine face
again, and those clear eyes, in which alone in a world of corruption I
have seen the disinterested light of welcome?
However, I did not despair. What would happen to innocent prisoners if
they were deprived of the pleasures of Hope?
Ah, I well remember that autumn day when I first saw the sun of liberty
appear on my horizon, and with its advent those chances of truth,
reparation and happiness which my imagination pictured all too quickly!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account