Narrative and Miscellaneous PapersDe Quincey, Thomas
General
Narrative and Miscellaneous Papers
De Quincey, Thomas
English essays; English fiction
On this occasion, whilst illustrating Kant's notions of the animal
economy, it may be as well to add one other particular, which is, that
for fear of obstructing the circulation of the blood, he never would
wear garters; yet, as he found it difficult to keep up his stockings
without them, he had invented for himself a most elaborate substitute,
which I shall describe. In a little pocket, somewhat smaller than
a watch-pocket, but occupying pretty nearly the same situation as a
watch-pocket on each thigh, there was placed a small box, something like
a watch-case, but smaller; into this box was introduced a watch-spring
in a wheel, round about which wheel was wound an elastic cord, for
regulating the force of which there was a separate contrivance. To the
two ends of this cord were attached hooks, which hooks were carried
through a small aperture in the pockets, and so passing down the inner
and the outer side of the thigh, caught hold of two loops which were
fixed on the off side and the near side of each stocking. As might be
expected, so complex an apparatus was liable, like the Ptolemaic system
of the heavens, to occasional derangements; however, by good luck, I
was able to apply an easy remedy to these disorders which sometimes
threatened to disturb the comfort, and even the serenity, of the great
man.
Precisely at five minutes before five o'clock, winter or summer, Lampe,
Kant's servant, who had formerly served in the army, marched into his
master's room with the air of a sentinel on duty, and cried aloud in
a military tone,--'Mr. Professor, the time is come.' This summons Kant
invariably obeyed without one moment's delay, as a soldier does the word
of command--never, under any circumstances, allowing himself a respite,
not even under the rare accident of having passed a sleepless night. As
the clock struck five, Kant was seated at the breakfast-table, where he
drank what he called _one_ cup of tea; and no doubt he thought it such;
but the fact was, that in part from his habit of reverie, and in part
also for the purpose of refreshing its warmth, he filled up his cup so
often, that in general he is supposed to have drunk two, three, or some
unknown number. Immediately after he smoked a pipe of tobacco, (the only
one which he allowed himself through the entire day,) but so rapidly,
that a pile of glowing embers remained unsmoked. During this operation
he thought over his arrangements for the day, as he had done the
evening before during the twilight. About seven he usually went to his
lecture-room, and from that he returned to his writing-table. Precisely
at three quarters before one he rose from his chair, and called aloud to
the cook,--'It has struck three quarters.' The meaning of which summons
was this:--Immediately after taking soup, it was his constant practice
to swallow what he called a dram, which consisted either of Hungarian
wine, of Rhenish, of a cordial, or (in default of these) of Bishop.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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