His other difficulty regarded himself. He had now attained the end
at which he had aimed. He had been instructed in a religion which he
was convinced would promote the happiness of his people if it could
be established among them. But how was that to be done? With regard
to himself, he had had wise and learned men to instruct him. But what
could his abilities do in such a work--especially considering the wild
and savage manners of his countrymen? In every light, the greatness of
the attempt perplexed him.
With a mind distressed by these difficulties, he took an affectionate
leave of his kind friends in England, and embarked for Africa in one of
the Company's ships, which was named after him, the Naimbanna. Though
he had shown great affection for his own country and relations, yet
the kindness which he had received from his friends in England had
impressed him strongly; and it was not without a great struggle that he
broke away from them at last.
The distress he felt was increased by the society he mixed in at
sea--being very different from that which he had left behind. The
profligate manners and licentious language of the ship's company
shocked him exceedingly. The purity of his mind could not bear it. He
had hoped, that in a Christian country he should always find himself
among Christians, but he was greatly disappointed.
The company he was in appeared to him as ignorant and uninformed as his
own countrymen, and much less innocent in their manners. At length, the
oaths and abominable conversation which he continually heard, affected
him so much that he complained to the captain of the ship, and desired
him to put a stop to so indecent language. The captain endeavored
to check it, but with little effect, which gave Naimbanna increased
distress.
But still the great burden of his mind, was the difficulty which he
foresaw in the attempt to introduce Christianity among his countrymen.
Many were the schemes he thought of; but insuperable obstacles seemed
to arise on every side. All this perplexity, which his active and
generous mind underwent, recoiled upon himself.
His thoughts were continually on the stretch, and this, it was
supposed, at length occasioned a fever, which seized him when his
voyage was nearly at an end. His malady increasing, it was attended
with delirium, which left him only a few lucid intervals. In these, his
mind always shone out full of religious hope and patient resignation to
the will of God.
In one of these intervals, he told Mr. Graham, a fellow-passenger with
whom he was most intimate, that he began to think he should be called
away before he had an opportunity to tell his mother of the mercies of
God toward him, and of his obligations to the Sierra Leone Company. He
then desired him to write his will, which he began in the presence of
Captain Wooles and James Cato, a servant that attended Naimbanna.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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