Great Britain -- History -- George V, 1910-1936 -- Fiction; World War, 1914-1918 -- Fiction
She found an early opportunity to carry on her investigations. For, at
dinner that night, she found herself, Tietjens having gone to the
telephone with a lance-corporal, opposite what she took to be a small
tradesman, with fresh-coloured cheeks, and a great, grey,
forward-sprouting moustache, in a uniform so creased that the creases
resembled the veins of a leaf. . . . A very trustworthy small tradesman:
the grocer from round the corner whom, sometimes, you allow to supply
you with paraffin. . . . He was saying to her:
"If, ma'am, you multiply two-thousand nine hundred and something by ten
you arrive at twenty-nine thousand odd. . . ."
And she had exclaimed:
"You really mean that my husband, Captain Tietjens, spent yesterday
afternoon in examining twenty-nine thousand toe-nails. . . . And two
thousand nine hundred toothbrushes. . . ."
"I told him," her interlocutor answered with deep seriousness, "that
these being Colonial troops it was not so necessary to examine their
toothbrushes. . . . Imperial troops _will_ use the brush they clean
their buttons with for their teeth so as to have a clean toothbrush to
show the medical officer. . . ."
"It sounds," she said with a little shudder, "as if you were all
schoolboys playing a game. . . . And you say my husband really occupies
his mind with such things. . . ."
Second-Lieutenant Cowley, dreadfully conscious that the shoulder-strap
of his Sam Browne belt, purchased that afternoon at the Ordnance, and
therefore brand-new, did not match the abdominal part of the belt that
he had had for nearly ten years--a splendid bit of leather,
that!--answered nevertheless stoutly:
"Madam! If the brains of an army aren't, the life of an army _is_ . . .
in its feet. . . . And nowadays, the medical officers say, in its
teeth. . . . Your husband, ma'am, is an admirable officer. . . . He says
that no draft he turns out shall. . . ."
She said:
"He spent three hours in . . . You say, foot and kit inspection. . . ."
Second-Lieutenant Cowley said:
"Of course he had other officers to help him with the kit . . . but he
looked at every foot himself. . . ."
She said:
"That took him from two till five. . . . Then he had tea, I suppose. . . .
And went to . . . What is it? . . . The papers of the draft. . . ."
Second-Lieutenant Cowley said, muffledly through his moustache:
"If the captain is a little remiss in writing letters . . . I _have_
heard. . . . You might, madam . . . I'm a married man myself . . . with
a daughter. . . . And the army is not very good at writing letters. . . .
You might say, in that respect, that thank God we have got a navy,
ma'am. . . ."
She let him stagger on for a sentence or two, imagining that, in his
confusion, she might come upon traces of Miss Wannop in Rouen. Then she
said handsomely:
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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